"He's insane, but I love him." She shook her head. "Now, let's get you ready for this evening. I think I'll put you in red. Won't that drive Ethan absolutely wild?"
"I'm thinking Ethan needs no encouragement to end me," I grumbled.
Stephanie pushed open the door to another room, one I hadn't seen before. "He doesn't want to end you. He wants to drink from you — so much, in fact, that I'm pretty sure if he doesn't regain some focus, he's going to punch Cassius in the face."
"That can't end well."
"They fight." She shrugged. "Quite often."
"Isn't Cassius your… king?" I was going to try to find a better word, but that was the only one that seemed to fit.
"Somewhat." She looked down at the ground. "Or at least at one point, he was supposed to lead us — but it's hard, for an imperfect being, pulled between two mortal planes, to do that without losing himself in the process."
"What do you mean?"
"He's both human and immortal. He has two different types of chemical makeup fighting for dominance. Sometimes his human side wins. Other times, the angel side. It's frustrating to follow someone who doesn't even know himself."
"Hmm." I thought about that for a while; they'd made me believe Cassius was like Satan himself, but now I was starting to wonder if he was just misunderstood.
"When you close your eyes," she whispered under her breath, "he'll explain himself better."
"Who?"
"Cassius."
"What? Did I miss an important part of this conversation?"
"You'll see." She smiled. "And then you can make your own judgment, yes?"
"Um, sure?"
"Yes, this!" She moved to a large closet and opened the doors. "I think the dress is in here."
I was still mulling over the fact that Cassius would somehow explain himself to me when a shoe flew by my head, missing my cheek by mere inches. I flinched.
"Sorry! I forget you're breakable."
"Very." I paid special attention to flying objects and went over to the closet. "Will Cassius be there tonight?"
"If Ethan allows it."
"And he won't try to take me."
"Not with us there, no."
"But he'll still try."
Stephanie's hand hovered over the other shoe. "Every day. Until you no longer exist."
Ethan
I should have known something was wrong the minute I got into my new Lexus LFA and drove like hell down the winding road.
I'd become accustomed to nice things in life. Living as long as I had, I'd learned to take pleasure from hobbies. My interests ranged from collecting fine art to archery. Had I not done something with my time I would have gone absolutely insane.
My most recent pleasure? Cars. The leather felt smooth against my hot skin; the smell tantalized me. And the speed? Well, the speed was just a bonus. But not now… it seemed everything absolutely paled in comparison to the taste of her.
Maybe it had been too long — the effects of bloodlust could drive a vampire insane — but it wasn't mindless lust I was feeling for her, just intense desire to be near her, to drink from her, to share my soul with her for no other reason than I'd bonded with her.
But if I shared more of my blood, if I took more from her, giving her mine in exchange, she'd continue to be able to see my memories, my dreams — everything I'd been keeping close for the past hundred years.
And the horrible part? She wasn't invested, at least not emotionally, and the last thing I wanted was for her to pity me. The idea made me snort out loud, a human pitying an immortal. The idea was laughable, if it wasn't so damn tragic.
She'd want to make the pain go away…
When really I just wanted to start over.
Cassius wasn't at his usual spot, opting for a more public arena. I hadn't wanted to argue with him yet again over what his presence did to mere mortals. I'd simply sent him a text and agreed to meet in the U District for coffee.
Cassius hated coffee.
But he drank it because it made him feel normal.
I drank it because it took the edge off wanting to rip someone's throat out.
The car squealed into a nearby parking spot. I hit the alarm and made my way toward Starbucks.
People stared.
They couldn't help it.
Just like they couldn't help but ask for autographs, even though they had no idea who I was — just assumed, by my looks, that I was famous or about to be.
Years ago, it had been flattering — when I still possessed a heart and didn't think the world was going to come crashing down around me at any second. Years ago, I had been naïve.
No more.
Cassius was sitting outside, though it was drizzling. He was covered by the umbrella, sipping at his cappuccino and reading the freaking newspaper, like he didn't already know everything there was to know.
I dropped my keys onto the table loudly.
He didn't look up. "Got you a caramel-macchiato thing that tastes like hell. You're welcome."
Rolling my eyes, I took the cup into my hands and sat down, bringing the hot liquid to my mouth.
It was bitter.
It tasted nothing like her.
I couldn't even pretend that I was enjoying myself. Would nothing take the edge off?
"So…" Cassius set down the paper, and gazed at me from behind his sunglasses, which kept people from asking why the hell his eyes kept turning white. "That was clever of you."
"Vampires… we're known for it," I said in a dry tone, leaning back in my chair. "Besides, you owed me, and you know it."
"I saved your life." Cassius snorted. "I hardly think that puts me in your debt."
"You had no proof, no right, no—"
He held up his hand. "Enough. I don't wish to discuss the past."
He never did.
I cursed and took another sip of coffee. "What's done is done. Now we wait."
Cassius looked so out of place sitting in a small chair, appearing to fit in. His body was too large, his countenance too dangerous. He tilted his head as if listening to the wind. "Her scent is on you."
"Caught that, did you?"
"A hundred years."
"People really need to stop reminding me," I grumbled, no longer interested in my coffee or the conversation we were having. Why the hell I'd agreed to meet with someone I used to call brother was beyond me.
"You aren't as strong as I am, Ethan. You cannot hope to keep me from her, not when so much is at stake."
And there it was.
I hissed out a breath. "I'm afraid your hands are tied."
"Are they?"
I stood, placing my palms on the table, towering over everyone. "You'd repeat history for your own selfish reasons? Is that what this is? I'm trying to save lives, Cassius! This has nothing to do with her!"
"Which is why your eyes," he said calmly, "continue to go black, why your blood boils beneath the skin that covers it, why your heart is in perfect cadence with hers. Yes, I can hear it, even from this far away, though I can't directly find her. Know this… I will."