“Let go of me,” she screamed, fighting with everything she had.
“It’s okay, baby.”
“It’s not okay.” How could Ryder say that? Didn’t he know that they would beat him too? Then maybe they’d lock both of them up and no one would ever see them again.
The fists came at her, hitting her in the chest over and over again until the pain became unbearable.
As the pain got worse it got harder and harder to breathe.
“Shh, sweetheart, you have to calm down or you’re going to hurt yourself.”
“Not worse than they’ll hurt me,” she countered. Nothing was worse than that, they’d broken her fingers and her arm, they’d cracked her ribs, they’d broken her cheekbone and given her a concussion.
They’d do it again.
And worse.
“No, baby, I won’t let them hurt you, not ever again.” Ryder said it so confidently that she actually believed him.
Arms wrapped around her and she was snuggled gently against a hard chest. The bald man and his army faded away into nothingness.
For the moment the horrible overheated feeling was gone, she wasn’t hot and she wasn’t cold, she just felt warm and comfortable. Her chest hurt and it was a little harder to breathe than it should be, but she felt … content … even safe.
She shouldn’t.
Not here where they were still in danger.
And not with Ryder.
Definitely not with Ryder.
He wasn’t safe, never had been and never would be.
Yet right now, she felt safer than she had in a very long time.
Chapter 2
June 15th
12:16 A.M.
Spider could feel her slipping away.
He didn’t have what he needed to treat her, and from the looks of things the ibuprofen hadn’t done a thing to help with her fever.
Her pulse still raced, each breath was clearly an effort for her, and while he might not have a thermometer to take her temperature he could tell by touching her skin she was burning up, and he feared it would climb higher. She was confused and hallucinating, and although he’d managed to calm her down he wasn’t sure that next time he would be able to.
Abigail had been convinced there had been another person here in the room with them, someone who terrified her.
Her tormentor?
A figment of her imagination?
He’d initially thought that she was talking to him, telling him to go away, and it had gutted him. He knew he’d ruined what they’d had not once but twice, and he knew that the chances of him being able to earn her trust back were slim to none, but he wasn’t giving up on her. He would apologize every day for the rest of his life if he had to, he would send her flowers and find a million ways to say I’m sorry.
He loved her.
It was as simple as that.
When it boiled down to it, he could continue to believe he wasn’t good enough and let other people dictate how he spent his life, or he could finally give himself permission to move on. While he thought he actually might have made it to that point in his life, he also had to accept it might have come too late.
He might have already lost Abby for good.
If he had then he had no one to blame but himself. He was the one who had walked away from her, he was the one who had betrayed her, he was the one who had thrown her and her love away.
Abigail whimpered in his arms, and the feeling of impotence that he couldn’t fix this for her was overwhelming. He was a Navy SEAL, he saved people, protected people for a living, and yet the one person he loved the most he couldn’t save.
“It’s all right, Abby,” he soothed, brushing her hair away from her sweat streaked forehead.
“No,” she mumbled, “don’t let him come back.”
“He’s not coming back, baby,” he promised. He might not be able to banish her hallucinations, but he could make sure that no flesh and blood man laid a hand on her again.
“If he does then kill me.” Her eyes fluttered open and she met his gaze directly. “I don’t want to go back, if he comes then kill me. Promise?”
His heart stuttered in his chest. The raw fear on her face ripped him apart. Whatever she had suffered here had led her to a point where she would rather be dead than go through it again.
“I promise you that I will make sure no one will ever hurt you again,” he vowed. There was no way he was promising her that he’d kill her. They were safe enough here until a team came in to pick them up, he’d already made the first check in to Perez without incident, so as long as they believed that the man he’d killed was here and keeping watch over the compound then they weren’t going to come out here.
Abigail’s eyes fluttered and fell closed, carefully easing her down to rest against the mattress, he put his hand on her forehead. He could swear she felt hotter than she had last time he’d checked.
If her temperature climbed much higher, he wouldn’t be able to bring it back down. It would be hours before the team could come to pick them up, probably not until tonight, and he didn’t have medications on him to do much more for her than he already had.
He had to do something to break her fever.
His eyes roved the one-room shack searching for a solution. There was a small kitchenette, the bed where he had Abigail, there was a table and chairs in the corner, and the armchair facing the TV screen where he’d found Perez’s man. There was also a small bathroom. It wasn’t enclosed, just a tub and a toilet and a sink in one corner of the room with two screens offering some privacy.
The tub.
If he filled it with cold water and put Abigail in there it might help bring down her fever.
It was worth a try.
Standing, he walked over, put the plug in, and turned the faucet on. While he waited for the tub to fill he went back to the bed, and with as much professionalism as he could muster, he stripped the borrowed clothes off Abigail then scooped her up into his arms and carried her over to the bath. As attracted as he was to her now wasn’t the time to be remembering the way they used to burn up the sheets, now he needed to keep a cool and calm head so he could do what he needed to do to save her life.
Abigail was unconscious. He couldn’t put her in the bath on her own which meant he would have to get in with her. Setting her down beside the bath, he quickly removed his shoes and clothes, then picked Abby up again and stepped into the tub.
The water wasn’t too cold, more a pleasant cool that wiped away the oppressive heat of the jungle that had been pressing down on him since he first arrived. Spider sat down, leaning against the back of the tub with Abigail between his bent knees.
She rested heavily against him, and he hated seeing her like this, so still and lifeless, that wasn’t his Abigail.
His.
She’d always been his, he just hadn’t realized it.
Walking away from her had been the biggest mistake of his life, and he wished it was possible to take it back. Walking away from her the second time, after he’d worked so hard to win her heart again had just been plain stupid.
Sitting with her like this in his arms, her hot skin against his bare skin, he couldn’t deny that even with their lives in danger alone in enemy territory, and even with her body battling a high fever and an infection that could kill her, holding her again felt nice.