“Thank you. And you look…” I couldn’t think of the right word. Hot didn’t fit him. And I could only imagine the look he’d give me if I said scrumptious. I opted for simple and safe. “Handsome.”
His head dipped, and a playful smile tugged at his lips. “That can’t be what you wanted to say.”
I blinked. Was Mathis flirting with me?
But before I could answer, he straightened and spun me around the floor. I wasn’t oblivious to his hand at my back, or how close he held me.
“I like this,” he murmured, drawing me flush against his body.
“Like what?”
“Dancing with you.”
Such a simple statement, but one that flipped my world on its side. “But I thought…”
“What?”
That since I was human, I wouldn’t interest him. That because of my curse, he wouldn’t risk condemning any children we might have had. Yup, those were the thoughts circling my twitterpated head.
“I’ve…had a fair bit to drink tonight,” I stated. “I don’t know what I’m thinking.”
He lifted a brow. Obviously, he saw right through my lie. Made me feel better, though, to pretend as though I was oblivious.
Change the topic. I cocked my head and regarded him for a moment before asking, “Do you ever regret being a werewolf?”
He blinked. “Why would you ask me such a thing?”
I shrugged and let my hand drift further down his back. If I wasn’t mistaken, a flash of desire whisked across his face.
My pulse picked up. “Do you?”
“No, I’ve never regretted what I am. Do you regret that you’re human?”
“Every day,” I whispered, hoping he understood the hidden message.
He lifted a hand and hooked his index finger beneath my chin. “Never regret who you are.”
“Easy for you to say when you belong. You were always the pack’s golden boy. And now you’re the alpha, while I’m…”
He shook his head. “A beautiful and intelligent woman.”
“But I’m not a wolf.” And then, emboldened by the alcohol and the dance, I whispered, “And I’ll never have you.”
Not a hint of surprise crossed his face. So, he knew then. My heart slammed into my ribs as I waited for his response.
“Alpha?”
We stopped moving on a dime. Mathis’s arms tightened around me, and with a growl, he turned and eyed the wolf who dared interrupt us. “What?”
I peeked around him, my mouth twisting at the sight of Sloe, a female a few years older than me. Course, most were older than me. At twenty-one, Rumor and I were two of the youngest in the pack.
And from the shade Sloe was throwing my way, it was obvious she didn’t think too highly of me. Whatever. Few did. Another reason Rumor had surprised me when she’d asked me to be her MoH.
Sloe ducked her head and gestured behind us.
I felt Mathis sigh as he guided us around. His muscles tightened, but before I could ask what was wrong, he released me and stormed off toward Rumor and Conrad. I turned and grimaced at the sight of her nose-to-nose with her father.
“You don’t belong with him,” Sloe’s dark voice rose behind me.
I whirled back around. She stood before me, her strawberry blonde hair a halo around her head. Her face twisted, marring the dusting of freckles across her nose.
“You hear me?” she demanded, her light blue eyes shining with power.
“That’s not your decision,” I murmured. Mathis was the only one who could make that call.
“It is our decision. It’s the entire pack’s decision. He’s our alpha. Who he chooses as his mate affects us all. And you aren’t worthy of him. You can’t even shift.” She sneered. “Look around. Does it look like the pack would accept you as our alpha’s mate?”
I stole a glance around the room. Every pair of eyes followed me, their mouths moving as they whispered among themselves.
“It was just a dance,” I whispered more to myself than Sloe.
“It’s never just a dance with the alpha. Do us all a favor, and back the hell off. Let him choose someone better than a shiftless no-account like you.”
Tears priced my eyes. I knew some in the pack thought me an anathema, but to hear it so boldly stated hurt. Whatever hope I harbored for Mathis died a horrible death.
I lifted my chin and forced back the tears that threatened to spill down my cheeks. No way in hell would I give in to them. Not here in front of the whole pack.
With my dignity still intact, I turned and marched toward the bar. If my humanity was all that was holding me back, I could fix that. At least I’d learned something from Conrad. But first, some liquid courage. Two more tequila shots later, I grabbed Piper’s hand and dragged her out of the hall.
2
“Juniper,” Piper hissed, her breath steaming in the wintry Canadian Rockies air. “What are we doing here?”
Here was the old Cleary sisters’ shop. During all the hullabaloo two months ago, Alasdair had murdered the sister witches. Wiped out of existence, all because they’d learned the truth and had intended to pass it along to Rumor. Which, apparently, was code for you die now. From what I’d heard, Alasdair hadn’t been gentle with them either. Word on the street was that it’d taken the cleaners days to get all the guts out of the carpet.
Once cleansed of all evil, and any lingering ghosts, a new owner had moved in. Another member of the local coven. The realtor must have offered her a killer price for the building, because, damn. Lord knows I never would have bought this place. Not after that.
“I don’t like this,” Piper pressed.
Ah, Piper. The voice of reason in my otherwise chaotic head. I lifted my chin and stared up at the waxing moon floating among a sea of glittering stars. I’d spent many a night staring up at the sky, wondering what the wolves felt. Did the moon sing to them?
With a sigh, I smoothed my hair back from my face. “Do you know how I start my day every morning?”
“What?”
My gaze slid to Piper. Concern wrinkled the corners of her eyes. I couldn’t blame her for her confusion. Tequila plus rampant emotions equaled crazy single woman on Valentine’s Day. “Every morning, I wake up and try to think of three things I like about my life. Do you know why only three?”
She shook her head.
“Because, when I first started doing this, that was all I could ever come up with. And they’re always the same three things.”
Sympathy chased across Piper’s face.
“I’m one of four humans in our pack. Of the four, I’m the only one born to werewolf parents. The others are human mates brought in by the most submissive members of the pack. I’m tired of being something I’m not.”
“I know.” Piper’s fingers closed around my wrist. “But that doesn’t tell me why we’re here.”
“We’re here because…” I turned back toward the moon, then sighed. “Because I’m tired of trying to find a reason to enjoy life. I’m not human, but I’m not a wolf either. I’m trapped in this hellish limbo. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve considered striking out on my own and carving something worthwhile out of my life. Go to college, meet a boy, fall in love…”