“I’d ask you why you did this, but I already know why. Tonight, at the wedding, you told me that you hate being human.”
I nodded. That much I knew. I ran the cloth over his knuckles, mindful of his wounds as they closed. “My humanity stood in the way. The pack would never accept me.”
“Hey.” He drew his hand from mine and touched my chin. Something flickered in the back of my mind. A whisper of a memory, perhaps. “Your humanity never bothered me. It’s who you are.”
“Were,” I muttered.
“Are,” he repeated. “You’re Juniper Johnson, human extraordinaire. It never mattered to me that you couldn’t shift. You have so much more going for you. You’re beautiful, intelligent, creative as fuck… I wish I could have told you all this tonight. Just another reason to bash Conrad’s head against a wall.”
I blinked back tears. As far as I could remember, this was the first time someone had ever said anything nice about me, other than my parents. “It doesn’t matter anymore. I’m a werewolf now. Or will be if we…”
“Juniper, you don’t even know me. I’m not going to hop into bed with you.”
Equal parts relief and disappointment crested over me. Something grumbled in the darkest corner of my mind. Sounded almost like…a growl? I gasped and jerked in my chair, my head cocked as I listened for any other signs of my wolf. I’d heard her voice before, but this was a far more visceral reaction. As though she disliked what he had to say.
“What?” Mathis straightened, his eyes narrowed as he surveyed the room. “What’s wrong?”
“I heard her again.”
“Her who?”
“My wolf.” I lifted my hands to my mouth and giggled. “Oh, you can’t imagine how this feels.” At the sight of his raised brow, I burst into a full laugh. “All right. Maybe you can. It’s just so wonderful.” I reached down and clutched his hands. “I don’t want to lose this. This is who I am. Some trick of nature denied me my wolf. But I have a chance now, don’t you see that?”
“I’m starting to,” he commented as he extricated his injured hand from mine.
“Do you know what I do remember about my life?”
He inclined his head.
“Hating the night of the full moon. Watching from the shadows as the pack shifted and ran together. Hearing you all howl and play together. This pack is the only family I’ve ever known, but I’m not a part of it.”
“Juniper—”
“Let me finish. Maybe seeking out the witch wasn’t my brightest decision, but it was also my only choice. This isn’t all about you. It’s about me as well. Finding a place within my family. Becoming whole after an entire life of feeling broken and neglected. I don’t want to be a wolf just because I want you. I want to be a wolf so I can finally be me.”
He stared at me, his expression soft with awe. “I never realized.”
“Why would you?” A broken sob slipped past my lips. “The only time people pay attention to me is when they’re calling me names and telling me how useless I am. I never meant to hurt you, though. And if this upsets you…”
“If? Juniper, this is killing me. We have two days to fix this mess you’ve gotten yourself into. Otherwise, I lose you forever. Did you ever stop and think about that?”
Emboldened by his confession, I brushed my thumb over his freshly healed knuckles. “If that’s how you feel, then you know what we need to do.”
“Yeah.” He scoffed under his breath. “Mate with a woman who doesn’t even know who I am.”
“If it helps, the witch said my memories should come back once we fulfill the spell.”
“Should,” he repeated, his face stern. “I didn’t want it to happen this way.”
“Do you mean that? Or do you just not want me?”
“Juniper…”
“It’s a fair question,” I stated. “And we’re practically strangers now, so…”
He sighed and rose from his seat. His fingers threaded through my hair, guiding my head up until our gazes met. He leaned over me, our mouths an inch apart. My pulse thumped in my head, my whole body coming alive with the promise of a kiss. Maybe I couldn’t remember him, but every other bit of me knew him.
“No matter what, you will never be a stranger to me,” he whispered, his breath hot on my lips.
My heart melted into a puddle of goo.
God, I wanted to close the final gap between us. It was the strangest sensation to want someone I didn’t know so badly.
He shifted and brushed a light kiss against the tip of my nose, then straightened and headed toward the front door. “Let’s go.”
“What? Go where?” My head was spinning, I couldn’t keep up.
“To the witch. She’s going to reverse this.”
His words cut to the quick. “Didn’t you hear a word I said?”
He paused and glanced over his shoulder, his brow furrowed.
“I don’t want to be human again. I did this for a reason. We have two days. Even if we don’t become mates, I’m going to find a way to stay a werewolf.”
“Juniper…”
I shook my head, then turned and left the room.
Here I thought he understood.
5
I jerked awake, startled by the heavy comforter tangled around my legs and waist.
The hell?
Last I remembered, I’d eaten the second chocolate, then face-planted onto Mathis’s mattress. Alcohol and magic—a nasty combination that had drained the life out of me. Even now, my head and ribs throbbed. The former was likely the result of a hellish hangover, the latter I had no idea. The way I’d slept, maybe? Sprawled diagonally across his bed, my legs half-dangling to the floor. Ugh.
I pushed myself up, then winced at the feel of drool smeared across my cheek.
Great. Just freaking great.
My first night in a hot werewolf’s bed, and I’d hiked my dress up around my ass and drooled all over myself. Wiping the back of my hand across my cheek, I turned and inspected the room through half-slitted eyes.
Sunlight streamed through the blind slats, illuminating the room with more light than was normal this time of the…
Afternoon?
I stared at the offensive clock—convinced it was lying to me. Four twenty-five in the afternoon. Seriously?
I scrambled off the bed and teetered across the room. My clutch sat on a small plush chair. I hadn’t put it there. Mathis, perhaps? My cheeks blazed with heat. Had he come in to check on me only to find my whole ass on display? Maybe that explained the comforter.
Great start to the day.
I shoved my hand into my clutch and extracted my cell phone, all twisted up in a pair of spare panties I carried around with me. You know, preparation and all that. Not that I’d ever needed…well, today was the first time I would ever make use of the spare underwear in my purse.
After a quick tap on my phone, I confirmed the time. Hell, I’d slept till near four-thirty in the afternoon. I’d never done that before.
On the upside, Valentine’s Day was now next year’s problem. On the downside, I’d lost nearly an entire day. And the night before. Which meant I had… Frick, I couldn’t count that high without a calculator. Something like twenty-six hours remaining in the spell.