lifted the phone, pressed a couple of buttons, and spoke hushed words into the receiver.
When she hung up, she waved toward the massage suites. “You can go on back. He’ll see you now.”
“Thank you.” Vivian felt her stomach seize up with every step toward that room, not knowing what he would do in light of her breaking their very illegal contract. She hadn’t felt this afraid since her first visit, after knowing what would happen to her behind that thick, solid door.
“Vivian,” he said, looking larger and more frightening than she remembered him.
She swallowed, her hand still on the knob, feeling like a rabbit ready to bolt. Only she couldn’t do that. She had to stay and convince him to release her from this craziness. “I can’t come back here anymore.” She said the words so fast they seemed to be one word running and blurring together.
His eyes darkened and then narrowed. “And why would that be? You know the rules and what will happen if you stop coming here. I have more than enough video and photographic evidence to damn you.”
A tear slipped from the corner of her eye and trailed down her cheek. “Please. You have to let me go. Michael froze the account. I don’t have access to any more money.”
“Borrow it.” His voice was clipped.
“From who? How would I pay it back?”
“That’s not my concern.”
She slid to the ground, her back pressed against the door while sobs clawed their way out of her throat. For the first time she was thankful for the soundproofing. It seemed as if hours or days passed, but then she felt him looming over her.
Vivian looked up to see a box of tissues in his outstretched hand. She took a couple and wiped the tears away. Anton pulled her to her feet and brushed her hair back from her face with his fingertips.
“This is very stressful for you, isn’t it?”
She nodded, her lip still trembling.
He looked almost apologetic. “I will accept another form of currency.”
They’d been standing so close, nearly in a lover’s embrace. She stepped back. “I’m sorry, what? You want me to have an affair with you so you won’t tell my husband I’m having an affair with you?” Hysteria was making her ears ring, so it was possible she hadn’t heard him right.
He chuckled. “I’ve already seen you, already touched you. What difference does it make, at this point, what else transpires between us? Don’t look so stricken. You’ll enjoy it. Just like you’ve enjoyed everything else I’ve done to you.”
She felt the flush creeping up her neck and the wetness between her legs. The more control he took of her, the more it turned her on. Her mind sat as background noise, screaming at her, horrified by all of it. But like a drunken hedonist, she moved closer to him again, closer to the sin he held out like a bright, shiny apple.
The sin she couldn’t be blamed for because she was the victim. Right? He owned her. At least on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
He watched the expressions play over her face and then frowned. “We are not becoming lovers in the sense you’re thinking.”
You have no idea what I’m thinking.
“Do not get attached to me, Vivian. What is happening between us will not happen forever.”
“Because you’ll get bored with me?”
“Hardly.”
“Then why?” Why am I asking like I want it to never end? He was too attractive, smelled too good, had an accent that made her knees weaken with that deep, rounded tone. And he commanded her and played her body like an instrument only he knew how to wield with notes only he’d been given the music for.
“That’s enough talk,” he said. “Will you offer me the currency I ask, or are we back to threats? The threats do get tiresome, flower.”
A lump had formed in her throat, and she worked to swallow around it. “What do you want from me?”
“Everything.”
Her breath stopped for a minute and she had to consciously think about it to get it started back up again. “Everything, meaning?”
“The game has changed. You will come see me the same days as before. No money will exchange hands. Instead, you will do whatever I ask you to do for the hour and a half you’re in this room.”
“Sex?”
He couldn’t have been more clear if he’d spelled it out on a billboard with bright, flashing lights. And yet, she had to hear the full confirmation that he was truly asking her to whore herself out to him. She could barely remember how this had started.
He held her gaze and nodded. “But more. When you are in this room with me, you will address me as Sir. Do you understand?”
The moment the word Sir left his mouth, the feeling between her legs turned into an unbearable ache she somehow knew only his hands, mouth, or cock could soothe away. She nodded quickly, not giving herself time to think and chicken out.
“Answer.” His voice was harsher than she’d ever heard it.
Her eyes jerked up to his. “Yes, Sir.” She paused a moment, then said, “What about Janette? She takes a payment from me every week. What will she think?”
“Janette thinks what she’s told to think. Don’t worry about what she thinks. Just sign in, and come to me. Now, put your purse down, and come here.”
Vivian looked down to find she was clutching her bag in her hand, her knuckles turning white. With some difficulty, she managed to pry the thing out of her grip and place it next to the door. He held out a hand to her and she moved toward him.
Her mind spiraled into an abyss of endless questions and second-guessing. Why am I doing this? I can still leave. He didn’t lock the door. Is this really even about Michael at all? What difference will sex make at this point? Is it an affair, yet? Am I the victim if I keep making the choices? I could have worn a wire and caught him blackmailing me the second time. I could have turned him in.
I still can.
Her head was spinning suddenly with the evidence of her own complicity in her demise. Which was easier? Being the victim? Or being the whore? Somehow she hadn’t been able to erase either role from her psyche.
“Do you need a few minutes to think about this? At this point, it is your decision. You can walk away. There will be consequences, of course, but that is still your choice. You could even attempt to press charges against me, if you felt so compelled.”
Did she want to press charges? He’d opened her up and made her body feel things again, things she’d missed so long she’d ceased recognizing the dull ache of longing that seemed to never leave the center of her chest. Until this.
“I don’t know.”
“What do you want, Vivian?”
“You. But it’s wrong.”
“Why is it wrong?”
“You’re a horrible human being,” she said, wondering if the question had been rhetorical and feeling foolish now that she was sure it had been.
“And you’re a pure little virgin? Untouched. Unspoiled. The perfect victim? You could have left after our first meeting.”
“I would have lost Michael.”
“Does that matter to you?”
“Yes.”
“You’re making a bargain with the devil. I will ask increasingly more from you as time goes on. And you will give it to me. You might lose your soul in the process.”