‘Was he killed?’ Ava asked.
Laura’s eyes and mouth opened wide. How did she know? ‘M … my father?’
‘No. I meant Eddie Whatshisname. You said was.’
‘Ah. No. Eddie Irvine. He wasn’t killed.’ My daddy was. ‘He retired from racing, that’s all.’
Laura fell quiet after that and Ava soon gave up trying to make small talk, becoming engrossed in her book and leaving Laura to her thoughts.
Over twenty years after his death and she still missed her father with a raw, visceral pain. And yet, the few memories she had of him were vague. Perhaps they weren’t recollections at all and merely images pieced together from what she’d been told about her father over the years. She was only six when he was murdered.
She’d spent her childhood trying to patch up her mother, who had understandably gone to pieces. Laura had tried to make Noreen proud, but no matter what she did, it was never good enough, never enough.
‘You remind me too much of your father,’ Noreen would say to Laura.
Laura didn’t look a lot like him – she got her red hair, freckles and pale skin from her mother’s side of the family. So she supposed that meant she must have a similar personality. Laura liked the idea of being like her da. But she wondered if Noreen secretly wished she’d lost her daughter instead of her husband. Laura sometimes felt as if she’d lost both her parents that day.
Tears sprang to her eyes, so she followed Ava’s example, pulling her novel out of her handbag to take her mind off her father. But after a few minutes, Laura realized she’d read the same paragraph four or five times and hadn’t taken in a word of it. She closed her book with a sigh. She still felt nauseous, so she looked out of the window. The bus was hurtling along at an alarming speed. At least they should arrive at the airport in good time.
But just outside Dublin, they hit traffic and came to a standstill. At first Laura’s nausea was replaced by relief.
Until Ava looked at the time on her mobile and said, ‘It’s going to be tight now.’
Sarah spotted it first. There had been a car accident, a collision between a white car – a Ford Fiesta, maybe, which was on its roof, and a badly damaged grey Audi a few feet away from it. There were also emergency vehicles with flashing blue lights – Garda cars, ambulances and fire engines – and a lot of broken glass. There was no sign of the drivers or any passengers. Laura hoped they were all right. They had a good view of it all from the bus, although Laura tried not to look. Once the traffic had trickled by in the one lane left open, the bus picked up speed again.
‘We’re going to be late,’ Ava said.
Oh no. They couldn’t miss the flight. Not now. Laura had psyched herself up for it. Plus she’d received her passport and gone on a diet – although she’d not lost much weight in the end – and spent months brushing up her French. And she did want to see The Naturals.
‘No, we’ll be all right,’ Claire said. ‘We’ll have to get a move on, though.’
‘At least we’re in the bus and not in one of the cars back there,’ Sarah said.
Despite her impractical footwear, Ava sprinted into the airport first, making a beeline for the Aer Lingus check-in area. The others followed, zigzagging around travellers pulling suitcases or pushing luggage trolleys. Laura jogged as fast as she could, struggling to keep up. Her heart was hammering, partly due to the physical effort and partly because she was terrified of losing the group. Thank goodness her new suitcase had wheels.
‘Take a carry-on,’ Claire had advised Laura when they’d bought the tickets. ‘If we all travel light, we won’t have to pay extra in Dublin or faff around when we get to Lyon.’
Laura only had the one suitcase. It had once belonged to Noreen. It was massive and heavy even when empty, so she’d rushed out and bought a smaller one.
‘We don’t need to go to the Aer Lingus desk,’ Sarah called after Ava. ‘We’ve already checked in online.’
This was true. Claire had talked Laura through it on the phone and she’d printed out her boarding pass. She also had it on the app on her phone.
‘Sensible Sarah,’ Claire said jocularly. Laura was grateful to Claire for keeping calm. It was saving her from losing it.
Ava stopped by the departures board. ‘The gate’s up,’ she announced.
‘That way,’ Sarah said, pointing towards a sign for Security.
The two of them started to run again, but Claire called them back. ‘The gate’s up, but the flight’s not boarding yet. We don’t need to rush.’
Laura followed the others through security, watching what they did and copying them. She hadn’t known to put liquids into small containers and transparent plastic bags, so most of her toiletries were confiscated.
‘Not to worry,’ Claire said cheerfully. ‘I’ve got shampoo and conditioner and we can always buy some more when we get there.’
In the end they got to the gate with five minutes to spare before boarding. Laura needed to rest but the seats were all taken, so she slumped to the floor with her back against the wall. Sarah sat down next to her.
‘You should check your suitcase in that metal stand over there, Ava,’ Sarah said. ‘It looks like it’s about to burst open. If it doesn’t fit in there, you’ll have to pay for it to go in the hold.’
Ava wheeled her suitcase over to the baggage sizer and as Sarah had predicted, it didn’t fit. Claire offered to take some of Ava’s clothes in her luggage.
‘You have to pack your own things,’ Sarah said. ‘It’s a safety thing. You’re not supposed to carry anyone else’s stuff.’ Everyone looked at her. ‘What? You’re not. Just saying.’
Claire and Ava ignored her, knelt on the floor and transferred some clothes from Ava’s suitcase into Claire’s. Sarah messed about on her phone. Laura resisted the temptation to take out hers and send a text to Mrs Doherty to ask after Harry. It had only been a few hours since she’d dropped off the cat at her neighbour’s.
And then it was time to board the plane. Laura’s stomach clamped in panic. By the time they’d got onto the plane and found their seats, she felt as if she were about to faint. Claire had to put her case in the overhead bin for her. Laura sat down, sandwiched between Claire and Ava. She fumbled with the safety belt – it seemed complicated and her hands were shaking.
‘Is something the matter?’ Ava asked as she deftly attached and adjusted hers.
Helping Laura with the seatbelt, Claire replied for her, ‘She’s never flown before.’
‘Away on!’ Ava exclaimed, then added, ‘Sure, the pilot can’t be worse than that buck eejit bus driver.’
Laura tried to grunt her agreement, but it came out as a sort of squeal.
‘The plane’s the safest means of travelling, so it is,’ Claire said, patting Laura’s hand.
‘There’s a first time for everything,’ Sarah said from across the aisle. There was no one next to her, but some passengers were still standing, stowing luggage or waiting for someone to sit down so they could get to their seats.
‘Do you want the window seat?’ Ava asked.
Laura managed to shake her head and force a smile.