Still, for the first many years of living with The Seep, joy was all around her, like a cloud, a mist. From the kitchen, she could hear Mariam telling a long joke in what sounded like Arabic. Everyone laughed. Emma started singing a folk song in French.
Trina poured a little more wine into her glass and stayed, watching the fish swim lazily across the long wall of water. And all the emotional processing! It wasn’t just Allie and Peaton, either. Nowadays everyone expected you to talk about your feelings all day long. Not just lovers or close friends, either. Joe Shmoe on the street wanted to show you his dream journal. Trina had learned long ago (through the patience of a very loving Deeba) to open up about her feelings, her childhood, all that ancient history. But now, it seemed like everyone wanted to share their innermost emotions as casually as if asking for the time. At her last volunteer shift at the food co-op, Trina had spent two hours processing a random woman’s latest past-life regression while shelving cans of chickpeas. It was too much.
Trina readied herself and went back to the dining room. The party had moved to the living room floor. Everyone was trading foot massages, reclined on colorful pillows, the punch bowl in the center of the room.
“We’re doing a toasting ritual, Trina!” called Peaton. “What do you want to toast to?” He poured from the punch bowl and held the glass out to her.
Trina gestured with her wineglass. “I’m good, thank you.”
“It’s better if you drink the same thing as us, Trina,” said Allie earnestly. “Better for the ritual to be a cohesive unit.”
Trina suppressed an eye roll. She accepted the glass but set it down next to her. Sometimes it was better to agree than argue. Deeba wriggled her little brown feet into her lap. Trina smiled and started rubbing her wife’s fat lovely toes.
Mariam raised her glass high. “Let’s toast to Trina, for becoming a doctor!” Everyone raised their glasses of punch. “It’s nice to be useful, isn’t it, old girl?”
Trina grinned. “You know, it really is.”
“To being useful!” shouted Horizon Line. “And, as I have remained a humble artist, to being un-useful! And apparently, not as good as I used to be.” He cackled. Everyone toasted anew. Trina hit Horizon lightly on the thigh. He winked a pretty eye at her.
“I think you mean useless,” said Emma, taking out her claws.
Trina turned to Deeba. “Is this punch Seeped?”
“Darling, it’s a party,” Deeba murmured. “And we’re not working tomorrow. Don’t worry about it.”
“I should know what I’m putting in my body.” Trina raised her voice. “Sorry—Peaton? Allie? Dinner was amazing, by the way. Is this punch Seeped? I have a long day tomorrow at the clinic.” She saw Deeba’s mouth twitch at the lie. Whatever.
Peaton considered. “Very lightly Seeped,” he said slowly. “I don’t even feel it.”
Trina snorted. Peaton communed with The Seep for hours in meditation every day; of course he didn’t feel it. “Well, you know I’m a lightweight.”
“I’ll get you a charcoal water,” said Allie, pushing up to her feet. “I’m sorry, that was thoughtless of us.” She looked like she was about to cry again. “I just wanted all of us to be on the same page, you know?” She frowned at Trina’s wineglass. “Alcohol has a really challenging energy for me right now.”
Trina grimaced. “Uh, sorry?” But Allie had already gone into the kitchen.
“You know,” said Mariam, “I read that charcoal water is a total placebo. It doesn’t actually flush out The Seep from your system.”
Emma tilted her head. “It works for me, I’ve used it lots of times.”
“Well,” said Deeba. “Placebos work, at least some of the time. Belief is important.” Allie came back with the charcoal water and placed it in front of Trina.
Trina opened it and drank. “Thank you.”
“Oh, no, babe,” said Emma. “You broke Trina’s placebo!” She laughed. “Right? If she doesn’t believe in it, it won’t work.”
“I think the real question is, why is Trina so hesitant about joining with The Seep?” asked Peaton. “They are our greatest teachers. We can learn so much from them.” His eyes swirled with the telltale blue-green of alien intervention. “Just think about our poor friends in the Compound, cut off from it all.”
Trina snorted. “You can learn things from books, too. Not like anyone reads anymore.”
“Yes, that’s exactly my point,” said Peaton. “Why would you passively read a book, when you can join with The Seep and experience the world on the most visceral and connected level?”
“What I want to know is how the kids in the Compound feel about all of this,” said Emma. “I mean, their parents choose to live separately from the alien influence, and that’s their prerogative, but do their children have a choice? I know we’re all free to do as we wish, but sometimes being free to do something affects those in your care. It’s not right!”
Deeba’s mouth folded into a little line, which meant she was thinking hard. “I think you have to do what you think is right, no matter what. And of course that affects the people you love, but you still have to do what you know is best.”
“Trina, do you agree?” asked Peaton.
“I do agree, my baby is so smart.” Trina kissed Deeba’s foot. “But I’m trying to get laid tonight, so I have ulterior motives.” Deeba laughed her wonderful, throaty laugh. Peaton and Allie exchanged glances.
“Think of the children!” shouted Mariam. “Won’t someone think of the poor Compound children?” She raised her glass up for another toast. Trina suppressed a yawn. She discreetly glanced at her watch, but Deeba caught the gesture.
“Hey, lover, the Compound called,” she whispered. “They want their watch back.” Trina could see the tinge of The Seep in her wife’s eyes. She was high. They wouldn’t be leaving this party anytime soon. Trina wanted to go home, eat ice cream, have sex, and then watch old episodes of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine on the Electric Spirit. It was looking like none of those things would happen now.
“Hey, Trina,” said Horizon, putting down his punch. “Wanna get some air?”
“Oh, no, Horizon,” said Allie, her eyes filling with tears. “Are you still smoking? It’s so bad for you!”
Trina smiled at her old friend. He could read her like a freaking book. “You know, I really do.”
“Maybe for my next performance piece I’ll grow new lungs,” said Horizon, winking at Allie. He and Trina pulled on their shoes and wandered off toward the back garden.