Wolf, E, Maj: Olivia, stop.
Klein, O, Pvt: god I’m just making it worse aren’t i
Wolf, E, Maj: Olivia.
Klein, O, Pvt: Please don’t transfer me. I studied for six years to get this assignment. I worked eighteen hours a day, I gave up any kind of social life which actually explains an awful lot when I think about it
Klein, O, Pvt: Please, Major, this job is everything to me.
Wolf, E, Maj: OLIVIA FOR CRISSAKES STOP
Klein, O, Pvt: Yessir.
Wolf, E, Maj: You’ve still got your job. You’re still on AIDAN. Your duties will be the same under Barker as they were under me.
Klein, O, Pvt: So wait…
Klein, O, Pvt: You’re not firing me for snogging you in the maintenance closet?
Wolf, E, Maj: I’m not firing you. But UTA regulations are clear. No officer can fraternize with a subordinate in their direct chain of command.
Klein, O, Pvt: Meaning
Klein, O, Pvt: Wait
Klein, O, Pvt: Meaning you want to fraternize?
Wolf, E, Maj: Yes.
Klein, O, Pvt: …
Klein, O, Pvt: With me? :)
Wolf, E, Maj: Yes. :)
Klein, O, Pvt: Oh.
Klein, O, Pvt: Well.
Klein, O, Pvt: That’s splendid, then.
Wolf, E, Maj: You’re pretty bad at this. :)
Klein, O, Pvt: God, I really am aren’t i
Klein, O, Pvt: I make up for it in other areas, I assure you
Klein, O, Pvt: That was innuendo
Klein, O, Pvt: I’m innuendo’ing you, in case you missed it
Klein, O, Pvt: oh god stop typing Liv
Wolf, E, Maj: Dinner tomorrow night?
Wolf, E, Maj: You can innuendo at me some more in person.
Klein, O, Pvt: Where shall we go?
Wolf, E, Maj: Lady’s choice.
Klein, O, Pvt: Well well, a gentleman.
Klein, O, Pvt: I think I’m going to like you, Major.
Wolf, E, Maj: It’s Ethan.
Wolf, E, Maj: And I think I’m going to like you, too. :)
Participants: Olivia Klein, Private, UTA Information Services Division
Stephanie LeFevre, Private, UTA Information Services Division
Date: 01/19/75
Timestamp: 02:37
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Well, look what the cat dragged in.
Klein, O, Pvt: :P
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Don’t u have a shift starting at like 05:00 tomorrow, by which I mean 05:00 today
Klein, O, Pvt: Yes I do, mum, thanks for asking.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Big Bad Wolf worth it, I presume?
Klein, O, Pvt: Steph why in god’s name are you IM’ing me, I’m in the same room as you.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: I don’t want to disturb Holmes in case she starts snoring again
Klein, O, Pvt: Oh my god, good point.
Klein, O, Pvt: Last night the bunk was shaking so badly I thought the ship was under attack.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: No bunks in the officers’ quarters. Must make a nice change
LeFevre, S, Pvt: bed still shakes tho?
Klein, O, Pvt: Oh look, a segue back into my sex life, how masterful of you.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: details, ████
LeFevre, S, Pvt: I want all the details
Klein, O, Pvt: Well, I want a cupcake big as my head and a holiday home in the Neo-Maldives. But we don’t always get what we want, do we?
LeFevre, S, Pvt: ████ you haven’t got proper laid since 2nd year college, this is cause for a senatorial inquest so give me deets
Klein, O, Pvt: Stop it.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: DEETS!
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Or I’ll start making them up in my head and you don’t want to know the level of tawdry that goes on in there.
Klein, O, Pvt: He’s
Klein, O, Pvt: Very nice :)
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Oh my god.
Klein, O, Pvt: What?
LeFevre, S, Pvt: YOU’RE IN LOVE WITH THE BIG BAD WOLF
Klein, O, Pvt: Shut up, I am not.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Olivia Marie Klein
LeFevre, S, Pvt: I’ve known you 5 years and while some consider the stick up your butt a cause for concern, I find it endearing
LeFevre, S, Pvt: And yet, you ARE the most tightly wound ████ I ever met
LeFevre, S, Pvt: so you saying “He’s very nice” is practically a declaration of desire to have this man’s babies
LeFevre, S, Pvt: it’s practically
LeFevre, S, Pvt: wait what’s that lady who writes about Mr. Dorcy?
LeFevre, S, Pvt: It’s practically Austenesque
Klein, O, Pvt: Shut up or I’ll mute you.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Admit it
LeFevre, S, Pvt: You’re living one of your romance novels inside your head rn
Klein, O, Pvt: I mean it.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Handsome older officer. Wide-eyed ingenue. Battlefield romance. Illicit dalliances in closets and probably a masquerade ball in there somewhere
Klein, O, Pvt: You know the word ingenue? I’m impressed.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: ████ please, I’m French
Klein, O, Pvt: Muting you now.
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Confess
LeFevre, S, Pvt: Your ovaries have detonated
LeFevre, S, Pvt: You are already mentally planning your wedding and wondering how drunk and embarrassing I will be as your maid of honor