He huffed. “You don’t believe in Mary Days?”
Blink. Blink. “Huh?”
“Bloody Mary Week.”
I cringed. “Gross. Uh, no, I’m a true believer, it’s just that I don’t remember any of it. Not bringing her home. Nothing. Just, flick of a switch, then I was in her room and she was in the shower.”
His voice lowered. “The motherfucking shower?”
Chills climbed my spine. “Well, yeah. Why?”
His jaw locked as he peered around, almost as if his mind was racing with a thousand scenarios, or at least one very grim one. “Then what happened?”
Being in the middle of an abandoned field, in the middle of the night, with a pissed and deadly biker and no witnesses, could make any man a little nervous. Since I wasn’t quite a man yet, I was practically shitting myself. “Uh, D-Delilah showed me some information on her laptop—the personality stuff—and said all she was reading reminded her of—”
It had only been days since my world had been turned upside down. I was pretty sure it would never be right-side-up again. Comprehending it all, which I wasn’t, was tough enough. Speaking of it all out loud? Debilitating.
Diesel pointed at me.
Swallowing, I nodded. “Yeah. It all reminded her of me. It was V who claimed I did something bad.”
“My sister told you?”
Clearly, she hadn’t told her brother. That got my attention. Up to this point, V had told her brother everything. They even openly talked about sex. Viola must have had a damn good reason to keep her mouth shut. It was at that very moment I chose to finally listen to Viola. She had always been somewhat of a bitch to me, but I always ignored her, only to learn that her keen sense was on point; I was no good for Delilah. The only way I could show Viola respect—thank her for being so good to Delilah—was to follow her lead and keep my mouth shut. All I told Diesel was, “Delilah doesn’t think it’s possible to hate someone she loves. I just know it, but she should. She should tell someone about what I’ve done. Whatever that may be. She should scream the truth. Diesel, promise me someday you will get her to do just that—open up to you.”
His callused hand wiped down his rugged face as he stared at me with an expression that had him spooked. Finally, he asked, “Would you do the same for Jenny?”
Just like that, another damn blackout arrived. Next thing I knew, I was on the ground, on my back, looking up at three guns pointed at my face. Diesel was sitting on top of me, horror etched into a face that never showed fear.
Heart ripped to shreds, tears dripped down the sides of my face. “The switch.” I was recognizing them now. How could I not? “How bad was I?”
Art and Red’s guns, still pointed, were trembling.
Stunned, Diesel fell back on his butt. I could hear the grass and flowers crunch under his weight. “Jesus. Fucking. Christ.”
Scorch’s voice trembled. “He don’t know who she is?”
“W-Who?” I asked.
Art, refusing to lower his gun, appeared manic. “JB faced that shit alone?”
My eyes slid shut, more tears pouring. I felt sick to my terrified stomach. “Do it. Shoot me.”
Scorch claimed, “Prez, I’d wanna be put down after that.”
Diesel grumbled, “This changes everything.”
I wasn’t brave enough to open my eyes. “W-What did I do? What did I say?”
Heavy breaths echoed into the haunted night. The secret I didn’t even know I was keeping was now spilling from my grasp. And I had no control over where it slipped to. Others were to govern over my tragic fate.
One of my governors, Diesel, finally spoke, “Art, Scorch, consider yourselves sworn to secrecy. This shit stays here.”
“Done.”
“Done.”
After some silence, Diesel’s voice sounded steadied when he told me, “They had your funeral today.”
All air was sucked from my lungs. My eyes drifted open as shock took over. What I saw in the dark sky looming over me was the memory of bikers shoving an overdosed man in the driver’s seat of Delilah’s car. They had let the only family I had left believe I was dead.
No longer were guns in my face. Only regretful expressions lit by Georgia stars glowing on the forsaken field.
Diesel added, “That baby girl thinks you’re dead, and now wants to save your soul. She asked that I give it freedom.”
I didn’t understand what he meant and was in too much shock to care. All I wanted was for my mouth, that wouldn’t open, to scream shoot me!
“She told me, tonight, that you deserve it more than she does.” Diesel exhaled a trembling breath. “Is she right, Kenny?”
After swallowing down a fierce sadness, I quietly said, “No. She deserves that freedom. I deserve the death she thinks I have. Please, make it be true.”
I prayed for him to hear how much I wanted all this to end, but after what felt like many minutes passed, he denied me. “We’re talkin’ about Delilah. Her wish trumps yours.” He stood, telling Art “Get a cage ready. We pull out tomorrow.”
I pled a whisper, “No.”
Still staring at me, Art asked him, “How long of a trip?”
Diesel put his gun away. “Steel Stallions is gaining a Prospect.”
Scorch’s jaw fell. “Ah, shit, here we come, Austin.”
That night I was locked back in the barn. Luckily, Scorch was exhausted with babysitting me and fell asleep. If I was being shipped out against my will, I had someone to say goodbye to first. In the corner of the dilapidated barn, I found some rotten wood and, as quietly as possible, ripped a hole just big enough for me to squeeze through.
Sitting against the barn, the big guy was snoring as I ran through the tall grass across the moonlit field. I wasn’t sure where I was, but Diesel had raced off to the right, so I ran in that direction down the dirt road. Once I got closer to the next road, I recognized my location. I took a left and continued toward the beauty that I didn’t want to let go. I should’ve known Art would be hidden in a shadow on her street before I could reach her house.
Smoking, he stepped out and held up his free hand. He whispered, “Never happening.”
Slamming my palms over my distraught face, I begged through whispers of my own, “Will I ever get to see her again?” Leaving without seeing her one more time was simply too much to ask.
“No.”
“Then let me have this one last moment with her.” I lowered my hands and glared at him. “You, of all people, should know what it’s like to say goodbye to that gorgeous creature made of light and hope.” His hand lowered. “Art, I know you love her. It’s hard not to fall in love with her at first sight, but then, when she speaks—” Art started nodding, looking away as if finding it suddenly hard to swallow. “You will get to see her, possibly touch her, every day that you are in this town. All I’m asking is for you to let me have one last glance. Then… I will be out of your way to have her. Permanently.”
Silently, Art unlocked the door of the impressive house built by John, Tuck’s dad. I was only half-surprised he had a key. After what I had learned the past few days, Diesel was in far deeper with the Ward family than I had known. This being where I lived only a week ago, I moved easily in the dark, not making a sound. Art followed me up the stairs. He didn’t trust me. I didn’t blame him. I wasn’t mad. I was too thankful he was gifting me this goodbye.