Martin must have sensed Walter’s acquiescence, because he pressed in close again and placed his lips tentatively to Walter’s jawline. Walter shuddered at the contact. For a moment he wasn’t sure where to put his hands, but then he grinned slightly and threaded his fingers through Martin’s soft curls.
They kissed some more, Martin resting his entire weight against Walter, supported by the rock. Now Martin’s cock was hard too, a delicious solidity against Walter’s own, and whenever Martin could draw a breath, he made marvelous little gasps and whimpers. When Martin trailed wet lips over Walter’s neck and then sucked on a cord of muscle, Walter leaned his head back and tried not to come.
“Wh-what do we do?” Martin panted.
At the moment, Walter was universally willing. “Anything you want.”
“But I don’t know how.”
That made Walter freeze. “You’ve never done this before?”
“No.”
“With a woman?”
“No.”
Oh holy Christ. Walter dropped his hands to Martin’s chest and pushed lightly. “We shouldn’t—”
Martin grasped Walter’s wrists and gently moved his hands to his waist. “Please?” Sunlight filtered through wispy gray clouds and the treetops. It illuminated Martin, making him look like part of that fresco in the bombed-out church where Walter had once spent three sleepless days and nights trying to keep some of his comrades alive.
Then Martin’s expression softened too, and he leaned his forehead against Walter’s. “We need this, you and I,” Martin whispered. “It won’t make us forget, not for long, but perhaps it will chase the memories away for a little while.”
Walter didn’t ask what memories Martin needed to evade. Instead, he gently worked his hands free and wrapped his arms around Martin, pulling their bodies flush. “We could go someplace,” he offered. Somewhere with a bed. Didn’t Martin have an entire motor court to choose from?
But Martin shook his head. “Next time. This place is best for now. It’s a place of new beginnings, you see.”
Walter didn’t see, and talk of next time and beginnings made him uneasy, as if he were about to make a promise he knew he’d break. But he tilted his head to brush his lips across Martin’s cheek. “Here, then.”
“Can I see you? All of you?”
Wisdom counseled against undressing in the open. But Walter held little faith in wisdom, and in any case, if he was going to be responsible for Martin’s first time, he ought to do it right. He’d never been anyone’s first.
Walter unhooked his arms from Martin’s waist and pushed softly at his chest. Then he reached for his own jacket zipper.
They were going to be cold, he realized as he undressed. Except excitement thrummed in his veins, warming his flesh from the inside. And then he gazed at Martin’s beautiful naked body, at the slender length of his rigid cock, and at the pure joy shining in his eyes—and the chilly temperature ceased to matter. Martin didn’t stare at him as if Walter were broken. God, nobody had ever looked at him as Martin was, and Walter hadn’t realized until just this moment how much he’d yearned for it.
“I want to kiss you now,” Martin said solemnly.
“I wish you would.”
Skin against bare skin was glorious. Martin had very little body hair, and his muscles beneath Walter’s questing hands were lithe and strong. As they kissed, Martin explored Walter’s body too, groaning over the thick hair on Walter’s chest, the heavy build of his shoulders and arms, the firm roundness of his ass. They pressed their groins together, rocking gently at first, then with increasing urgency. That could have been enough, and Martin wasn’t demanding anything more, but Walter wanted to give him a fuller experience.
He wrenched himself from the kiss by sheer force of will and dropped to his knees. As Martin gaped down at him, Walter grabbed a double handful of Martin’s delicious ass and began to nuzzle at the soft curls of his groin.
“What do I do?” Martin asked. He was breathing hard.
“Enjoy,” Walter replied, grinning up at him. Then he licked the length of Martin’s shaft.
Martin’s gasp echoed loudly in the quiet of the clearing, a sound so primal and erotic that Walter’s own balls tightened. He wanted more of that. But he noticed that Martin’s hands were clutching uncertainly into fists. “Hold my hair,” Walter ordered. “Hard as you want. I don’t care.”
He’d allowed his crew cut to grow out a little, more from apathy than desire, so the strands were just long enough for Martin to grasp. For a brief moment, Walter mourned the fact that he couldn’t reach the glorious soft halo on Martin’s head—but then, an equally nice prize was within reach. With a happy little hum, Walter slid his lips around the head of Martin’s cock.
When Walter had performed this act during furtive moments in the Army, his partners had tasted of sour, salty sweat and grime—the taste of soldiers who marched often and bathed rarely. He hadn’t exactly minded. It was like field rations: not ideal, but far better than no food at all. Besides, he knew he was just as dirty, so they had to endure his reek when they returned the favor. The men he’d been with since, stealing a bit of time in tavern bathrooms or the backseats of cars, had tasted of beer and cologne and laundry detergent.
Not Martin. He was salty, of course, but clean and sweet. Any soap smell blended completely with his own personal odor, which was a bit like woodsmoke and spring rain. It was wonderful. Walter devoured him, licking and sucking his length and swallowing him down, using Martin’s moans and whimpers to gauge what felt best. Martin did tug at his hair—just exactly hard enough—and that was lovely too.
When Martin rocked his hips, his buttocks flexed in Walter’s grip. But Walter was looking up as he sucked, and what really made his nerves thrum was Martin’s expression. Martin stared down at him with pure wonder and delight.
Groaning urgently, Walter grabbed his own cock and stroked in rhythm with his mouth. Fast. Faster. Then Martin cried out and his thick, salty-sweet seed flooded Walter’s mouth.
Walter swallowed and came with a shudder.
Somehow they ended up lying on their backs on the soft bed of pine needles, their jackets spread over their torsos for warmth. They held hands and stared up at the green-and-gray canopy.
Although he didn’t usually need reassurances, Walter cleared his throat. “Was that—”
“Almost perfect. I would have liked to taste you too.”
Damned if Walter’s cock didn’t give a little twitch at that. “It’s not always that… explosive,” he said. “Sex, I mean. Sometimes it’s just a wiggle and a jerk.”
Martin angled himself slightly to rest his head against Walter’s shoulder and neck. “It was such a good thing, sharing ourselves like that. Almost like when—” He stopped suddenly and sighed. “I forgot the shadows for a while. Did you?”
“Yeah.”
They remained silent for a long time—ten, fifteen minutes. Walter felt as if he were sinking into the earth. Maybe he really had put a bullet in his brain and the entire encounter had been the last fantasy of splattered gray matter. But no, Martin was here, solid and real, his curls soft against Walter’s skin.