“He, for now. In regard to gender, I remain undecided.”
The four femmes exchanged a look and Qalu braced. Helix was long past the age of maturity when one normally resolved such matters. But Beh-latan only said, “Then you’re currently neutral with masculine inclination?”
Solsan added, “I support your desire to take the time to know yourself fully. It’s an important decision, and it’s also valid not to choose. For some, both feel right, or neither. We respect your care in this regard.”
It was such a kind answer, and all her mothers wriggled their head tendrils, showing agreement with the sentiment. She had never loved them more.
“We only ask that you respect our Qalu and treat her well. Can you do that?” Beh-latan asked, somehow tender and steely at the same time.
“At this time, Qalu is the most important person in my world,” Helix said with remarkable sincerity. “I will never deceive her, never harm her voluntarily. And I will strive to increase her happiness in any manner available to me.”
She quivered and tried not to wish he meant it, that this wasn’t the facsimile of fondness she had solicited. He shouldn’t be so good at it, not proficient enough to make her believe their convenient fiction.
Khrelasa let out a happy breath. “That’s the right answer. We won’t ask for promises at this stage, better to take it slowly than suffer for it later. Would you be open to adding others to your love group? It’s much healthier, less stressful, more social value, and—”
“Alt-mother!” Briefly, she contemplated imitating Aevi and vanishing beneath some of the furniture.
“I have no objections,” Helix said.
“Excellent. Though I was skeptical at first, especially after the way you rushed me out last time, I may have been hasty in that judgment,” Inatol said.
“What is your chosen path?” Khrelasa asked.
Since Helix would have no idea that she was inquiring what he did for a living, Qalu answered quickly, “He’s an artist. Not well known yet, but he’s quite talented.”
Solsan stifled an amused noise. “You’re speaking from bias, my dear daughter, but I’m so pleased to see it. We had feared…” Her alt-mother stopped there, before the hurtful words emerged.
She’d heard them from her foremother often enough. That I wouldn’t find anyone, ever. That I’m born to live and die alone.
They would be so disappointed when she unveiled Helix as her greatest achievement in bio-synthetic life, not someone who loved her.
[ 5 ]
The visit ended soon after, much to Helix’s relief.
Every moment that Qalu’s mothers lingered, he expected one of them to shout, “Imposter!” And accuse of him of being an AI pretending to be Tiralan. Which was accurate.
“You did amazingly well,” Qalu said.
“I lack sufficient data to determine whether that appraisal is correct, so I must trust your assessment.”
“They liked you.”
“Truly?” Until awakening in this strange situation, he hadn’t devoted processing resources to analyzing such subjective considerations. Indeed, it had never occurred to him to question if he was “likable.” Instead, all his internal imperatives clamored for him to be productive and useful.
“They would have been difficult if they didn’t.”
“In what respect?”
Her head tendrils fluttered. “In every respect. Since you did so well, would you like to go out today?”
“Where would we go?”
“Anywhere you wish, though I thought we could visit the museum so you could experience the art in person.”
“Would that change my perception?”
“It might. Sometimes images don’t capture the feeling of a work.”
“Then I’m…” He hesitated, sorting through various emotions until he found the one that seemed correct. “Curious if that’s the case for me. I would enjoy the opportunity to verify if my visual receptors—”
“Eyes,” she cut in gently.
“If my eyes detect any differences.”
“Then let’s go.”
She led the way out of the habitat and input a code into her wrist unit. Shortly after, a vehicle arrived, a slim conveyance that gleamed silver in the rays from the twin suns. The oblong pod was clean and sleek inside, shaped to hold two passengers. Once, he would have been able to scan the unit to determine its efficiency, fuel consumption, and identify the power source. Now, he asked.
“An interesting transport. Is it yours?”
She moved her forelimbs in a negating gesture. “It’s a public vehicle, solar-powered. I requested a two-person shuttle and programmed our destination. This way.” She stepped inside and settled into the curved seat, beckoning to him.
Helix claimed the spot nearby. The space wasn’t large enough for him to maintain perfect distance, and at first he held himself rigid. Then the shuttle glided away and the motion swayed him so his limb brushed hers. It was still a shock, but the glancing touch didn’t create a riot of discomfort at least. Quietly, he sorted through the sensory input: warmth, softness, and the faint fragrance of her skin. There was a startling familiarity in breathing the same air in such close quarters.
This was his first journey since his existence shifted dramatically, and he could feel the movement as he couldn’t before, minute shifts in altitude and pressure that quickened his insides. As they moved, the ventilation system purred to life, filling the space with a refreshing scent. It settled the unease in his interior immediately.
“This is a smart pod. It detected your motion sickness and released an olfactory treatment. Do you feel better?”
After a few deep breaths, the sensation faded entirely. “Yes. Thank you.”
For a while, he simply enjoyed the sensation of flying, and when he shifted, the side of the pod brightened to display the view below, as if it sensed his desire to see. Tiralan was a striking world—he might even use the word beautiful if he was sure of its application—with fields of flowers and bright swaths of color from the elegant buildings that dotted the landscape. On Tiralan, there was no urban sprawl like on Barath. Instead, the settlements were more spread out, integrated without overwhelming the natural world.
Soon, the pod set down outside an ivory dome with narrow windows cut with razor-sharp precision, glimmering with slivers of light. “This is the Museum of Modern Art.”
Qalu alighted with fluid grace and turned to offer Helix aid in doing the same. But she didn’t touch him, didn’t grasp or pull, simply waited, allowing him to make the decision. He took a breath and let his mind settle, then he put his forelimb in hers, waiting for that unpleasant shock. There was a touch of strangeness, but not like before. Perhaps it came from making the decision himself or from mental readiness. As soon as he had his balance, she let go.
A frisson spiraled through him, but he lacked the experience to identify the emotion, though it was bright and sharp–all edges and slicing angles. “I’m looking forward to this,” he said, setting aside his unfamiliar feelings.
“To seeing the art or simply being out of the habitat?”
Helix hesitated, wondering if it would be offensive to say it was both. He was unaccustomed to being so limited, so chained in his perceptions. Though this new form had interesting features, it also lacked many of his former capabilities. His ambivalence must have shown because Qalu made an amused noise.