“Sorry, Zee, I was freaked,” I say, looking down at my feet.
Using his finger, Zephyr lifts my chin up so he can see my eyes. “Yes, and now I finally know what ‘freaked’ means,” Zephyr replies. “You have more courage than I thought.”
“Sweetie!” Buns calls out right before she lands outside the doorway of our room. Her golden butterfly wings float behind her with effortless grace as she strides into the room. Coming to me, she embraces me, squeezing me briefly. “That’s a killa new trick you came up with,” she says.
“Thanks, Buns,” I reply, seeing that she is trying to make me feel like less of a freak than I feel right now. “It just happened, I wasn’t even trying.”
“Well, it’s a very stellar party trick. You can clone yourself and then we can make everyone guess which one is the real Evie,” Buns says, smiling into my eyes with her cornflower-blue ones as she brushes a stray hair back from my face. “Can you do it again now? Can you send one to me?”
“I don’t know,” I waver, biting my lower lip and looking uncertainly at Reed who is watching me. He nods to me in encouragement.
“Try,” Reed says.
Nodding slowly, I close my eyes, breathing in deeply. Now that Brennus is coming, this may be my last chance to tell each of them what they mean to me. My heart speeds up as I allow thoughts of Brennus to create in me a sense of urgency, like I had felt when this first happened. Thinking of Buns, of the love I have for her, I begin to feel like I’m spinning, caught in a centrifuge. Opening my eyes, I sway again. Trying to keep my balance, I find it’s impossible and I have to go down on one knee again so I won’t fall down. A tremor jolts through me, causing a sense of lightness to expand within my body. Light is pushing its way out of me as my form is separating from itself. Seeing my likeness in front of me, it turns and rockets towards Buns, running right into her and disappearing in an instant.
I have no time to gauge her reaction to it because another shockwave hits me, causing another image of me to spill out. This one runs towards Zee, disappearing into him. Concentrating now on all the love and desire that I have for Reed, a pulsing heat, like fire, erupts within me as the light from me grows more intense. A brightly lit image of me bursts forth from my body and it turns immediately towards Reed. Losing the dizziness that drove me to my knee, I watch as my clone bolts to Reed, enveloping him in its fiery light before it vanishes within him. He closes his eyes as his perfect face transforms from a concerned expression to one of bliss. Slowly, he opens his eyes again and the deepest desire smolders within their dark green depths.
“Sweetie, I was wrong…that’s not a party trick,” Buns says as she staggers to the bed to sit on it. “That’s—I can smell you!” she remarks as her eyes widen and she pulls her honey-color hair to her nose, breathing in. She speaks to me in her musical language before she smiles and says, “That was like seeing love through another’s eyes. I will not forget it.”
“Dominion,” Zephyr says, not taking his eyes off of me. He has an awed expression on his face that I have seen only one other time and that was right before I managed to cut his arm with my dagger while sparring with him.
“We need to get them here now,” Reed finishes for him, but he’s not looking at Zee, he’s looking at me with that same expression of bliss still plastered to his face. “I will make the arrangements while you make the arrangements to get Brownie and Russell here sooner.”
“I cannot leave here now. They will have to make their way alone. I have not explained Russell to Dominion as yet. We can protect him once he is here, but I do not trust them to deliver him here if I were to tell them about him. It is too great a risk that they will keep him if I ask them to protect him,” Zephyr finishes.
Fear causes my palms to sweat as I see what I have done. I have ruined all of their carefully made plans. The plans to bring Brennus to them according to their own timeline and the plans to secure the safety of Russell and Brownie are now being scrapped because I messed up again. “No, Zee, you have to get them!” I say adamantly.
“They’ll be fine. Brownie is a Reaper and she kicks ass. She’ll be able to handle it,” Buns says with assurance, but I see the look she gives Zephyr over my shoulder. She is looking for him to reassure her.
As I observe Zephyr, something in his demeanor makes me feel cold. He is uncertain about them, that’s why he was going to get them. “Please, go get them, Zee,” I whisper in a hollow tone.
“He can’t, Evie. He has to stay with us now,” Reed says firmly. “We will have to rely on Brownie and Russell to make it here without help.” I want to argue with him, but I can see by the set of his jaw that he is not going to change his mind. He is firmly entrenched in the “protect Evie” mode and he will not deviate from that mission, no matter what I say.
Clenching my hands into fists, I want to break something. I keep thinking that this is all my fault. Grasping my phone, I walk from the room to out beneath the endless expanse of darkened sky in the courtyard. I dial Russell’s number, but it goes straight to voicemail. When his brief message prompts me to leave a message, I say, “It’s me. Call me when you get this.” Hanging up, I start to wonder if I affect Russell just as Brennus affects me. I wonder if the sound of my voice rips open all of the scars I have left behind in him.
CHAPTER 3
The Army
Trying to sit quietly and clear my mind as Phaedrus is instructing me to do, it is proving to be nearly impossible. I have thousands of thoughts going on in my mind and there are new layers of thought expanding almost daily. How am I supposed to channel that into one stream of consciousness? I wonder. Several “what if” scenarios are currently at work, viciously torturing me. Most of those scenarios have something to do with either Russell or Brennus, and in the worst scenarios, they involve both of them.
“This is not working,” Phaedrus sighs next to me. Opening my eyes I turn my head, looking at him sitting next to me. His legs are crossed, like mine, and his back is ramrod straight, exhibiting a perfect meditative pose. He is staring at me with his pitch black eyes. If I didn’t know that he is a Virtue angel, I would be creeped out by his eyes because there is no color differential between his pupils, irises and sclera—they are all black—making him look wicked. But I do know him, and I know that he is the farthest thing from evil. He is sent on missions of mercy to perform miracles, and at this moment, I’m very grateful that he is choosing to spend his time with me. We have been at this for hours now and I want to tell him it’s time to take a break, but I don’t want to let him down.
“Sorry,” I say, exhaling a breath that I have been holding.
“You are not letting go,” Phaedrus points out. “You are also not breathing.”
“Breathe more,” I remind myself, closing my eyes again.
“Yes, focus on what you want to accomplish–peace, serenity– if you can maintain those things and transcend rational thought for a moment–you can explore your newest ability,” he says in a coaxing voice.
“Everyone is always telling me I have to be more rational, Phaedrus. Now you’re saying I have to transcend rational thought. You guys are proving to be consistently inconsistent,” I sigh.