I fought it. Fate had to be wrong. Crescent Clan was to blame for my father’s death, so how could I love her? If I gave in to my desire for a traitor, it would surely make me weak, too weak to lead. Hadn’t Declan threatened exile and disinheritance before? If I accepted Nai as my mate, it’d put my uncle over the edge. I tried to convince myself “Crescent trash” wasn’t worth losing everything for…
Ironically, it was my brothers who’d refused to let her go.
Guilt gnawed through my gut for how I’d treated her that whole first semester. Hiding my mate marks, my identity, rejecting her like that. It nearly killed me; it definitely drove me to the brink of insanity.
And all the while, I watched in awe at the beauty of her soul. Her kindness, her enthusiasm, her persistence, and her loyalty all proved time and again how she was more than worthy of being my mate. She was my queen.
I dropped my head into my hands and sighed.
‘Nai…’ I called out through our bond, begging fate to grant me a boon. Instead, sinking dark horror filled me when there was no response. If—no, when—we completed our bonding, would I be able to hear her no matter which realm she was in?
Exhaustion burned my eyes and weighed down my limbs, but I wasn’t ready to give up. Not yet. I couldn’t go to sleep without a scrap of good news. I turned away from the fireplace and returned to the desk.
‘Did you find a mage powerful enough to break the protections on that portal?’ I asked Justice, slumping into the chair.
His response was immediate. ‘No, but I have a lead. Get some sleep. I’m on it.’
What did I do to deserve such loyal siblings?
‘Thank you.’
I set my head on the desk, allowing myself a minute of rest while thinking of Nai’s searing blue eyes and how she could look right into my soul. Then the pull of sleep took me.
Chapter Five
“We have a problem.”
Noble’s voice pulled me from slumber, and I shot upright. A piece of paper stuck to my face. I batted it away and looked up at my brother wearily. Fatigue, both physical and emotional, clung to me, making my vision blurry. One glance at the dark windows revealed the sun had not yet started to rise.
“What time is it?” I asked, blinking to clear the last vestiges of sleep. “And what do you mean by problem?” I stood and rolled out my neck and shoulders, then took in my brother’s serious expression. Crap. “You mean there’s another problem?”
“It’s five a.m.,” he said, nodding. He grimaced like his next words tasted bad. “Mallory is asking for her father to have a proper alpha burial. Said she can’t sleep until she’s guaranteed it.”
What. The. Mage?
I barked out a laugh.
A proper alpha burial meant he’d be buried in the Garden of Alphas alongside my father and other alphas who’d died after serving their packs for decades. That piece of trash could be buried in the woods, or we could burn him like Declan.
“No way. Proper alpha burials don’t go to shady challengers,” I growled as I walked to the adjoining bathroom off the study.
Noble grimaced again. “That’s what I told her. But she’s asking for an exception. Begging, really, saying the high mages spelled her father and tricked him into attacking you. She’s saying he was loyal to you.”
Tricked? Doubtful. Magically spelled I could buy but with his permission, no doubt. I ran the cold water and cupped my hands, splashing it on my face. As I straightened, Noble set a toothbrush and toothpaste on the ledge.
“Thanks,” I told him.
I brushed my teeth, noting the dark circles under my eyes as well as the five o’clock shadow. I looked beyond tired—pathetic, really.
“Any news on Nai?” I asked with a mouthful of toothpaste.
Noble was quiet, but I wasn’t sure if he didn’t understand my garbled question or if he didn’t want to answer. ‘Justice? What’s the word on that lead?’
Did my second-in-command even sleep last night? He’d said he had a lead, and then I fell asleep. I should be the one staying up all hours of the night, looking for her.
‘Sorry,’ Justice said, his words slurred. ‘I just nodded off for a second.’
‘That lead?’ I prompted, swishing out my mouth.
‘Yes, so Surlama’s sister, Kalama, is still indentured to the crown, and she has enough power to break those spells.’
And not high enough status to be brought back to High Mage Island with the master teachers for the meeting.
My eyes widened, and I looked at Noble. ‘Surlama’s sister? Can we even trust her?’
‘Do we have a choice?’ Noble and Justice both said in unison.
Touché.
‘I’ve strongly encouraged Kalama to break those spells.’ Justice yawned, the long, drawn-out breath echoing through our bond. ‘She’s working on them now.’
‘Strongly encouraged?’ I asked.
‘I may have threatened to kill her if she didn’t do it,’ Justice shot back. ‘It was three a.m., and I’m not in the mood for pattycake.’
I grinned.
‘I’m giving you a promotion,’ I said just as he strolled into the office.
He looked even worse than I, his black hair messily flattened on one side and sticking up on the other.
“I’m already your second.” He yawned again. “You can’t promote me any higher than that.”
I looked to Noble, who held up his index finger. “Technically, he’s right, but … you can make him head of the interrogation team.”
I faced Justice with a grin. “Done.”
Justice cracked his neck. “Since when do we have an interrogation team?”
“Since now,” Noble chuckled.
We all laughed with our normal brotherly banter, and for a brief moment, I almost forgot Nai was missing. But with my next breath, the gaping hole in my heart returned. Honor. Nai. They were family, the missing pieces of my heart, and I needed them.
‘Nai?’ I inhaled and shifted my thinking from my mate to my brother. ‘Honor—’
A loud knock at the door shattered my thoughts, and I groaned.
Please, don’t be Mallory.
Noble crossed the room and opened the door.
An ashen-faced guard stumbled in, covered in dried blood. His eyes were wide, and he worked his jaw, but no words came out.
Fur rippled down my arms at the sight of the older shifter, and I looked him over for injuries. “What happened, Simon?”
He was a guard from before my father’s time even. He shook his head, and when he spoke, his voice was hoarse. “Kirkland is … gone.”
Kirkland and Simon had been in the royal guard together for decades. They were two of the contingency I’d sent with Justice to Dark Row last night, two of the best—because I knew they’d take their responsibilities seriously.
Justice and I exchanged a look, and I could see the guilt in my brother’s eyes.
‘This isn’t your fault,’ I told Justice. I knew my brother; he was a protector, sometimes more so than me. These men were probably attacked right after he left, and he’d feel guilt over that.
Justice turned from me to Simon. “Was there an attack?”