“Oh,” she said, her heart hammering. She really wanted to get back to the journal now, but she couldn’t just slam the door in Ulrik’s face.
He frowned as he shot her a penetrating look. “Why are you asking?”
Rhi glanced inside the room. She could put the journal back and forget about it. Or…she could tell Ulrik and get his opinion. She opted for the latter. “I found a journal. A red one. The edge of it was sticking out from between the mattress and the box spring.”
“Read it,” Ulrik replied without hesitation.
Still, she hesitated. “They’re his private words.”
“About you.” Ulrik smiled and nodded. “You’re meant to read it.”
That surprised her. “Why do you say that?”
“Do you really think Con didna leave that there for you? Put just so? He doesna do anything without reason. You know that.”
Ulrik had a point. She tucked a strand of black hair behind her ear. “Thank you.”
“Anytime.” With that, he turned on his heel and walked away.
Rhi stepped back inside the bedroom and softly closed the door. Then she faced the bed. In the next heartbeat, she was on Con’s side, pulling the journal closer. Rhi touched it reverently as she walked to the hearth and curled up in the large chair.
She used magic to call up a mug of tea to the table beside her as she untied the red strings and opened the front cover.
I cannot breathe without you.
Chapter Two
I cannot breathe without you.
The first words on the page, written in Con’s bold strokes, caught her off guard. She ran her hand over the letters, the words blurring from her tears. She looked up and took a deep breath. Only when she knew she wouldn’t burst into tears again did she return to reading.
I’m not sure how I go through each day. I know I must because the other Kings depend on me, but without you here, I’m merely sleepwalking through life. I watch the sunrise and sunset. I watch the moon rise and set, and yet I know without a doubt that the only one for me is you.
I know you’re out there somewhere. I long to search for you. I tell myself that a glimpse of your smile or seeing how your midnight strands gleam in the moonlight would be enough. It’s a lie I tell myself nearly daily because I know if I do look for you, I won’t be able to go on without you beside me. It would slay me to see you now and not have you.
It wasn’t until you were gone that I realized how full you made my life. Now, it’s an empty existence.
Rhi dragged in a ragged breath as she teared up more at the anguished words on the page. Con put these writings in a journal, knowing that no one would ever read them. They weren’t contrived to elicit a response because they had only been for him.
She hugged the book to her chest and drew her knees up as she bent her head forward. For countless decades, she had raged about Con and the love he had so carelessly tossed away. She had cursed him, cursed love. Each new day that she faced, she’d made herself live it to the fullest to show him that she didn’t need him. Because she had known that their paths would cross again someday, and she wanted him to see that she could go on without him.
It had been petty and selfish, but she’d wanted to make sure she looked good when it happened. Mostly because Con never let any emotions show, and she was determined to do the same.
And their paths had crossed again—when she least expected it. She’d been gutted when Con so nonchalantly walked into Charon’s pub. When his black gaze landed on her, he hadn’t seemed to care that she was there, nor had he given any indication that they had once shared a love unlike any other.
At least, that’s what she had believed at the time. Now, reading just one page of the journal, she knew that he had hurt just as much as she had.
Rhi sniffed and wiped at her eyes as she straightened. She wanted to read more, but at the same time, she didn’t know if her heart could take it. She set the journal on the table beside her forgotten tea and got to her feet. Her gaze swept the room, lingering on the bed where they had spent so many hours making love, and even more lying in each other’s arms, simply talking.
They talked about anything and everything.
They made plans.
They laughed.
The months since their reunion had been the most glorious of her life. They even outshone the first days together when they had fallen in love. Maybe it was because both of them had experienced so much in between. She was a different person. She still loved him the same, but she was different. Just as he was different.
Life had shaped them, but love had brought them back together. A handful of months together had wiped out all the centuries of loneliness, anger, and hatred. That’s how powerful love was.
Rhi walked to the bed and curled up on Con’s side.
Con stood at the back opening of Dreagan Mountain and looked out as snow flurries danced in the wind. His gaze was focused on the mountains, but his mind was on his mate.
“The view never gets old, does it?” Ulrik said as he walked up.
Con glanced at the King of Silvers. “Never.”
“I was surprised you ended the meeting early. I thought we had a full one.”
Con smiled. “My mind is otherwise occupied.”
“By thoughts of a certain Light Fae who is even now waiting in your chamber?”
“Aye.” Con’s blood heated just thinking about Rhi. “I still can no’ believe she’s here. I fear I’ll wake up one day to discover it’s all been a dream.”
Ulrik snorted. “That willna happen. I’m no’ sure how, but we both came out of a hellish time with two incredible women.”
Con turned to face Ulrik. “That we did. It feels good—right—to have my mate.”
“But?” Ulrik asked, one black brow quirked.
“Rhi and Shara are Fae. They’re used to living a long time. The other mates are human. I still worry that things willna be so great in the future.”
Ulrik drew in a deep breath and crossed his arms over his chest. “That’s a valid concern. One every King understands. There isna a need to dwell on that now. We’ll deal with it when the time comes.”
“That’s no’ how I work, and you know it. I look at all conceivable possibilities and determine which is the most viable option.”
“I’m the same, but I hoped to take your mind off that,” Ulrik replied with a grin.
Con chuckled and glanced toward the front of the mountain and the manor. He heard the other Kings’ laughter as they moved through the tunnels.
“They’re excited about finding the dragons,” Ulrik said.
Con nodded slowly. “As am I. At the prospect of no’ only seeing my dragons but my children, as well.”
“We’re prepared for anything, though,” Ulrik told him.
Con swung his gaze to meet Ulrik’s gold eyes. “Rhi has such high hopes for how things will go with the twins. She’ll be devastated if it goes badly.”
“So will you.”
“Aye. There is so much I want to say to them, but I doona know how or where to begin.”