Bronco doesn’t shut the door behind him, letting the sound of Toby Keith filter into the room where Monroe and I still stand.
“Why did you come into the room with us?” Monroe asks, now challenging me with her unflinching gaze.
“I figured they might gang up on you.”
“Why don’t you ask me out if you want me?”
“I know you’re hiding behind a wall of lies. I’m worried the reality of you won’t live up to the fantasy I’ve created in my head.”
“You’re too honest,” she says, losing her confidence.
“Juggling lies only works for so long. Sooner or later, you’ll start dropping a few. Then, the rest is bound to hit the ground. Tonight, you lost control of one of them.”
Monroe gives me a pained look. “I thought of seducing you into bed and making a baby. Then, using our kid to manipulate you into protecting me. Wouldn’t that be a solid plan? You have no old lady to threaten me to leave town, and you’re an important guy. With your kid in me, you’d have no choice but to protect me.”
“Then, why did I remain unseduced?”
Monroe considers smiling at the idea of seducing me. Instead, she shrugs. “The kid would exist, and my troubles would become its troubles. I could love it as much as my mom loved me, but it wouldn’t wash off the bullshit it inherited from me,” she says and crosses her arms. “And I don’t know you. I have fantasies built up about what a great guy you are and how you called dibs on me because the universe whispered in your ear. And not because my fat lips made you think of blowjobs or that you wanted to tap my pussy before all your friends and family got a chance. So, I did the right thing by not seducing you, even if it wasn’t the smartest choice.”
Studying Monroe, I try to put myself in her place. Her earlier calm is slipping now. I see her get smaller as her gaze checks the door.
“I know you got a ride to work from Lisa Leigh, who doesn’t leave for a while. I’ll drive you home.”
“Why?”
“Getting to feel up my sexy body will help distract from your tough day.”
Monroe offers a small smile. Yet, on her face, I watch tonight’s reality hit her harder than Topanga’s hand. She walks past me and keeps moving until we’re in the parking lot. I take a moment to appreciate how she automatically knows my bike in a parking lot full of them. Nice to learn she wasn’t as oblivious to me as I sometimes sensed.
I slide on the bike and glance back at her. Monroe doesn’t join me with the ease of a woman accustomed to motorcycles. I add that little detail to the file in my head. One day, I plan to know everything about Monroe Hobbs, even if I have to pry the information out of her one fact at a time.
Once her arms wrap around my waist and her cheek rests against my back, I start the bike’s engine. Monroe doesn’t tense at the sound or tighten her grip. I take a minute to enjoy the feel of her against me. This moment’s been a long time coming. Too many nights, I had to talk myself out of offering her a ride that would end up with her on all fours in my bed.
Tonight, I pull the Harley out of the parking lot and drive on the quiet roads of the only home I’ve ever known.
A block from the Woodlands’ security entrance is the small apartment building housing the bunnies. I park my bike out front, not really in a spot. Who’s going to give me a ticket in Elko?
Monroe climbs off, and I sense immediately how the last sliver of her confidence is about gone for the night.
“You can’t take Lowell’s shit personally,” I say as we stand at the entrance to the four-story, sixteen-unit apartment complex. “He’s not used to feeling on the spot. Topanga’s drama didn’t help.”
“Why wouldn’t he be bummed to find out about me?” she asks as the corners of her luscious lips get stuck downward. “I mean, when Bronco’s kid showed up, it was a baby with a bunch of possibilities. Lowell gets stuck with a club slut with no real future. I’d be disappointed, too.”
“Monroe,” I say, slipping my fingers under her chin and lifting her face so she’ll look into my eyes, “I know tonight left you feeling like the bottom of a shoe. You’re probably assuming the worst, no matter what the blood test shows. You might even be wondering if you ought to bail on Elko before you get hurt or embarrassed more. But I need you to promise you’ll stick around.”
“He doesn’t want me to be his kid,” she says as tears threaten her brown eyes. “I mean, I knew he wouldn’t be excited, but I guess I didn’t really let myself imagine how crushed he’d be at finding out. I feel as if leaving would be best for everyone.”
“Fuck that,” I say in barely more than a whisper. “You have friends here. I know you’re tight with Amity. And I’m here. Do you have that anywhere else?”
Monroe’s broken expression falls more. I’m just rubbing salt into her open wound. Earlier, she claimed her mother was missing. I ought to be more careful with my words.
“Fuck Lowell,” I say as my fingers linger on her chin. “If he doesn’t want you, that sucks for your heart, but you’re owed shit. You have his blood in your veins. He doesn’t have to like a surprise kid from his past. But his daughter deserves to have certain things. Don’t let him weasel out of what you’re owed like your mother did.”
“She might be wrong about who my father is. She was a bunny.”
“Look, she got pregnant while living here. If you’re not Lowell’s, you’ve got to be the daughter of one of those guys.”
“What if I’m your sister?” she asks, getting a little fire back in her dark eyes.
“Then, I’ll have to break my no-incest rule.”
Grinning now, Monroe no longer looks ready to cry. “Needy kept a journal, and she swore that Lowell was the guy she slept with during the time she got pregnant.”
“Don’t leave Elko,” I say, stroking her pouting bottom lip. “No matter what happens with the blood test. Even if you’re crushed at learning your dad wasn’t who you thought, I’ll make sure you’re okay. No seducing or baby-making necessary.”
“Why?”
“Because the universe whispered in my ear.”
Monroe offers a tender, appreciative smile. “I won’t leave without telling you first.”
I consider kissing her, but Monroe’s too vulnerable right now. I need her to cream her panties over me rather than feel indebted to me.
So I keep my lips off hers. We have time. I fully trust Monroe won’t run off despite her hurt feelings over Lowell’s reaction. As long as I get what I want in the end, I can be endlessly patient.
MONROE
I’m normally a pragmatic person who rarely expects anything good to happen. I only want a basic level of comfort. So, when my life takes a tumble into a pile of manure, I tend to shrug off the experience. Why wouldn’t I end up miserable? No one in my family is lucky. Aunt Immee has enjoyed an easier life than most of us, but she’s only special as long as she remains married to Clive. The minute he gets bored of her aging face, she’ll be as unremarkable as all the Hobbs women.
But I let myself hope when I thought about Lowell Sinema. Mom built him up as a strong, smart man with the ear of Elko’s most powerful person. Lowell seemed like Clive but without the evil shit. I wanted to believe a part of me was a Sinema.