My emotions were an ever-boiling cauldron just under my skin; I knew we couldn’t leave Dis in total disarray, but the idea of having yet another meeting with the Princes, going through all the empty motions while my people were out there… it was almost enough to make me want to jump right out of my skin.
And under that desperate need to find them was a new emotion: seething anger that Lucifer had hidden something so vital from me.
I understood all too well how deep the need to keep one’s pride intact ran, the shame of being under someone else’s thumb. But for something as powerful as a soul-bond… if I’d known, we would’ve changed the plans. Lucifer never would’ve been allowed near Satan, let alone directly in his path.
And if Azazel had just voiced his suspicion, instead of letting Lucifer plummet right into the trap…
I paused in a dark corridor and took a deep breath, forcing myself to exhale all the rage building up inside me. Well, some of the rage, anyways. There was no way to work it off just through breathing exercises, and I was sure Azazel was beating himself up just as much right now. He’d lost a beloved sister, too.
If I lost my temper now and started pointing fingers, we’d never find them. Any hope of success was predicated entirely on becoming a fully united front.
I trailed my way upstairs, feeling as hollow and empty as a ghost. Even the gentle flip of Sarai low in my stomach couldn’t bring me out this funk. Here I was, with a broken wing and a useless, shattered Sword, and I couldn’t do a damn thing to help anyone.
Before I raised my hand to push my door open, I glanced down the hall at Vyra’s room. Something pulled me away from my own bedroom, and I silently padded towards her door and twisted the knob.
I half expected to see her flopped across her glittering pink bed, pencil or sewing needle in hand, but of course her room was empty. I closed the door behind me and leaned against it for a moment, taking another deep breath and looking around.
It was funny how Vyra could fill a space so entirely. She’d only been living in the Nightside with us for a month and a half, and in that time, she’d turned this one room into a sparkling bastion.
And I’d been so blind to the problems she kept balled up inside her, her constant fear of being taken, her feelings of helplessness.
Some friend I was.
I let my fingers trail over a rainbow of neatly folded silks, over the rough cotton skin of a dress-form, and on her dresser as I walked to her bed and sank down on the thick nest of blankets.
There was a sketchbook lying open, right where she’d left it before she’d been abducted. Harsh black lines covered the white page, but I averted my eyes before I fully saw the picture and flipped the sketchbook’s cover closed.
Even though she wasn’t here, I didn’t want to spy on her innermost thoughts and feelings. I just wanted to sit quietly for a moment in a place that felt frozen in time, like she might come bursting through the door at any minute. Everything about her room felt happy, just the way she was. The smell of her perfume still lingered in the air, the scent of spun sugar and jasmine petals.
I couldn’t imagine that same friend being terrorized by the Dragon.
I wouldn’t imagine it.
In fact, I was going to do something about it, broken wing or not.
I carefully laid back on her bed, angling myself so I didn’t crush my wing, and stared up at the diamond-studded embroidery of the canopy overhead. Sarai moved, just a little flutter in my belly, and I placed my hand on my stomach, thinking aloud to her.
“She’s a succubus,” I whispered. “According to her, a succubus who hasn’t reached her full potential. She’ll need weapons to survive.”
Unlike her sisters, Vyra hadn’t yet fed on enough sexual energy to be able to achieve her full form, a beautiful being of claws and spiraling horns. She was still a weak flyer, though she made up for it with sheer enthusiasm.
“And Belial told me the succubi are the protectors of women.” I frowned up at the canopy. “If she’s truly their sister, it would be their sworn duty to protect her. To help me find her.”
The only problem was finding and talking to them, if they’d even hear me out. Asking them to go looking for her was no small task, especially when so much of Dis needed help right now.
The tiniest creak of the door’s hinges caught my attention, but I couldn’t bring myself to sit up. I felt tired down to the bone despite the healing magic coursing through me, like I could sink right through Vyra’s bed into the floor and keep going.
“I thought I’d find you in here, angel.”
The rough purr of Belial’s voice was a welcome one. I heard the door close, and a moment later felt his weight sinking onto the bed next to me.
“I’ve just been thinking,” I said, reaching out and groping around until I found his thigh and squeezed it for comfort.
Belial raised an eyebrow, looking down at me. “Dangerous business.” He chuckled when I swatted at him and helped me sit up. Having one wing bound made me feel ungainly and off-balance.
“I was thinking of going to the succubi.” I leaned against him, resting my head on his shoulder, and looked down at my hand against his arm. It was paler against his bronzed skin, and still streaked with ash and soot.
“That so?” He rubbed a bit of the ash on my skin, leaving a gray smear behind.
From anyone else, the question would’ve sounded loaded, but as always Belial just really wanted to know why. I was glad he’d been the one to find me lurking up here in a depressive mood.
“Yes. She’s one of them, and they’re the protectors of women; it stands to reason that if anyone has a will or a way to track Vyra, it’s them. But…” I leaned in harder, managing a small smile. “I don’t know where to find them or their leader, and I was hoping you could help.”
Belial scrubbed his fingers through my hair, gently combing out some of the tangles. “Hmm. Their temple is in the Second Circle. I’ll bring you there myself, on one condition.”
“What’s that?” I asked, my eyes half-closed with contentment. With Belial on my side, some of the stress melted away. If he told me he’d bring me to them, then I knew he’d go to the ends of the earth to keep his word.
“You don’t go until tomorrow morning,” he said.
My eyes snapped open. “But we need to look now-”
Belial was already shaking his head. “We’re all covered in ash and blood. You just had the shit kicked out of you by one of your own mates and a massive fucking dragon, and you’ve slept for three days. You’re going to eat something, wash, and get some rest. I know you’re a walking powerhouse, angel, but you’re eventually going to collapse if you run yourself ragged.” He paused, clearly debating what to say next. “After all, it’s not just you alone anymore.”
I rested my palm against my stomach. He was right. It wasn’t just me anymore. I had a whole new person to care for.
“I can’t believe I’m the one talking sense into you,” he muttered, and lowered his hand to cover mine.
“No, you’re right. I could run myself into the ground at this rate.” If I wanted to help Lucifer and Vyra, I needed to be at my best. One of the first things we’d learned in Heaven was that a run-down warrior was a soon-to-be-dead warrior. Pushing myself to the limits with a baby and a broken bone was a guaranteed way to make sure all my efforts would be in vain. “I’ll try to sleep again. But tomorrow I’m going to this temple. I just hope they’re willing to do something for her. She’s belongs to them, after all.”