I sighed as I leaned my head back against the lounger. My brothers always gave me an ego boost. In their eyes, Brooke and I would always be perfect. “Maybe he makes me uncomfortable because he actually seemed to find me attractive.”
Brooke and I had always been careful about sharing too much with any of our brothers, because they had a tendency to insert themselves into any situation they judged as bad for their two sisters. But my relationship with Aiden had changed somewhat since Brooke had left California for good. I wasn’t sure if Aiden was realizing that we were all grown up now, or he was just mellowing out as he got older.
We’d become a lot closer, and we talked about a lot of things I’d previously only shared with Brooke. Granted, there was no way I was discussing my sex life—or lack of it—with any of my brothers, but we did talk more about personal stuff.
Not that he or any of my brothers didn’t think they always knew what was best for their little twin sisters, even though I’d already graduated with a doctorate, finished a fellowship, and was now on the job hunt for a position as a scientist. And Brooke was married and living across the country.
I was pretty sure that some of their high-handedness would probably never change, no matter what Brooke and I did.
But Aiden, Seth, and I had become much tighter since I didn’t see Brooke very often now.
“You are attractive,” Aiden said sternly. “And Brooke was not the pretty twin. I’ve heard you say that way too many times, and you need to get that thought out of your head. You two are twins, and even though you’re not identical, you look pretty similar. Your personalities are just different.”
I couldn’t argue with my brother’s point. Brooke and I had always been incredibly close even though our interests were dissimilar. And we’d gone in different directions after high school because we were different.
Brooke had gotten a degree in finance and had come back to Citrus Beach to work at one of the local banks.
I’d gone on to do a fellowship when she was already finished with her degree in finance, determined to do what I could to preserve animal species that were endangered.
My brothers had always claimed I was gifted. But I didn’t see it that way. College had just come easy for me, and science even more so. I’d finished my master’s degree by the time I was twenty-two, and my doctorate at twenty-four. My last two years had been spent doing a postdoc fellowship. I’d essentially spent my entire adult life studying and getting educated.
I’d always known I wasn’t going to get rich as a conservationist. I’d spent a lot of volunteer hours at various conservation organizations, doing everything from analyzing animal fecal matter to hand-feeding babies.
My twin had never shared my interest in ecology and wildlife, and we’d often gone our separate ways after high school.
But nothing had ever broken the twin bond we had, and I was sure that nothing ever would, even though we were physically separated now.
It was weird that I never really felt the distance when we’d gone to separate colleges, but it seemed profound now that I knew she was never going to come home again.
I was happy that Brooke had found her soulmate, but I missed her, and her absence now seemed so . . . final. I guess I’d never considered the fact that she might end up living somewhere other than Citrus Beach.
My twin had found the love of her life in Amesport, Maine.
And I was still in Citrus Beach and completely jobless and dateless.
Maybe that was why I felt so left behind.
I had way too much time on my hands right now.
Granted, after I’d gotten burned by a deadbeat in college, I’d been wary of almost any guy who had paid attention to me. Not that it happened often, except for the ones who just wanted to marry money.
I wasn’t really alone. I had three older brothers who lived close to me now, and a younger brother who had finished medical school and was currently in his residency out of state, but it wasn’t quite the same as having Brooke here with me.
I guess I’d always assumed that my twin and I would eventually be living in the same place once our education was done. It had been far more likely that I’d have to accept a job out of state or even out of the country.
It had never occurred to me that Brooke would be the one to move away.
“Maybe you should give Stone a chance,” Aiden said.
“He’s too . . . intense. Plus, you know about all of the crazy things he does. He’s pretty high-profile for his ridiculous stunts.”
Aiden shrugged. “He has a lot of hobbies. Hell, he’s been rich since the day he was born, so maybe he gets bored.”
“He runs a huge international conglomerate,” I reminded my brother. “How in the world could he get bored?”
“It’s not a crime to have fun, Jade,” Aiden said in a serious tone. “Maybe none of us are used to having downtime, but most people do. I know we all had to bust our asses when we were younger, and times were tough. But it doesn’t have to be that way anymore, baby girl.”
I ignored the nickname my older brothers had always used for Brooke and me. Honestly, they had been referring to us by that name for so long, I’d probably miss it if they didn’t use it.
“I feel guilty because I’m not off working somewhere right now,” I told him. “It’s weird knowing that no matter what I do, I’ll still be rich unless I do something completely idiotic. I’m not used to it. Are you?”
“Nope. I’ll probably never get used to it. But I’m not complaining. I didn’t really want to be a commercial fisherman all my life. And now I don’t have to be. I like being my own boss a lot better, even though I have to put up with Seth’s ugly mug every damn day.”
“He says the same thing,” I informed him.
“He sucks,” Aiden said gruffly.
Neither one of my brothers had to work together. But I honestly don’t think they’d know what to do without each other.
“Maybe I should have taken one of the lower-level federal jobs I was offered when I graduated,” I said. “Maybe I’d feel more normal.”
“Not happening. You’d probably end up out of state, and none of those positions were what you wanted.”
“Maybe not. But it feels so strange to be doing nothing.”
“You have your own charity. And you just got out of your fellowship,” he argued. “And you’re always busy teaching survival classes.”
“My survival skills are a hobby, Aiden. I want a real career where I can be making a difference. I’m going to keep volunteering, because every bit of experience I can get is valuable. But I want a job in conservation, even if I have to start at the bottom.”
“You haven’t really established yourself yet, Jade. Someday, you’ll be so busy that you’ll wish you could get a break. Don’t rush things. You don’t have to kill yourself anymore. Savor that for a while. Enjoy kicking back. It’s something we never had when we were younger.”
“You should talk,” I told him soberly. “I don’t see you and Seth slowing down.”
“He’s a slacker,” Aiden answered. “If I let him slow down, he’d never pick up speed again.”
I laughed. Aiden and Seth were close in age, and they were almost always together. But they loved to get underneath each other’s skin. “How are things going?”