“What do you mean?” I ask, the fear in my voice evident. I knew it had changed, but I’m afraid Dane knows something more than I do.
“Relax,” he says soothingly as his hand comes to rest on my shoulder, which is bare except for a tiny spaghetti strap. His warm palm on my skin makes me shiver. “The friendship is intact and strong. But there’s no unseeing what he saw that night.”
My body jerks slightly, and Dane’s hand squeezes my shoulder in return. “He told you the details?”
Dane’s eyes glitter with something I would say was dark amusement and his words cause my belly to flip. “I was watching you both. From a private club within that I belong to.”
The immediate heat that flushes from my chest, up my neck, and into my face warms me from within at the realization that both of my best friends watched me have sex. My heart thuds with the realization that I’m slightly turned on by this fact.
Rather than mull over my embarrassment, I tell Dane what I told Andrew yesterday. “It’s empowering. I liked it, and I’m going to continue to come here. In fact, I bought a membership. I don’t think Andrew has quite reconciled any of this, but I hope you can.”
Dane gives a gallant nod of understanding. “Avril… you are a grown, beautiful woman who has always been empowered. You’re just exploring a part of yourself that maybe you ignored.”
“So, you don’t look down on me? Think this is whorish?”
Throwing his head back to laugh, Dane lets me know he finds that ludicrous. When he captures my eyes again, he shakes his head. “Avril… if I thought women coming here made them whorish, I’d never get laid. I think the women who come here and explore their sexuality is the best fucking thing that ever happened to me. Takes a lot of the hard work out of connecting with someone, you know what I mean?”
I know exactly what he means. It’s why I don’t bother mingling with the people in here. I’m allowed to be a confident woman looking to have an amazing sexual experience, and there are hundreds of likeminded people in here all wanting the same thing.
Dane picks up his whiskey and knocks the rest of it back with a huge swallow. He pushes his glass away and shakes his head at the bartender to indicate he doesn’t want another.
He looks back to me and steps in so we are toe to toe. My head has to tilt back so I can maintain eye contact. “One word of advice, though.”
“What’s that?”
“Compartmentalize,” he says simply.
“Excuse me?”
“Keep this separate from the rest of your life,” he explains. “What you do in here is filled with intimacy by the nature of what you’re doing, but when you walk out those doors, it’s done. The single people in here aren’t looking for relationships. The swinging couples in here aren’t looking for a permanent third. Everything in here is fleeting and temporary, so don’t let your heart get tied up.”
“The last thing in the world I’m looking for is a relationship,” I immediately deny, and that’s the complete truth. One of the things I’ve enjoyed the most about my experiences so far—outside the stellar orgasms the likes of which Jamie never gave me—was that I didn’t have to worry about that person when I left them behind.
“I hear you,” Dane says kindly. “I believe you. But the longer you’re here, the more you’ll start developing a friendship of sorts with some of these people. Just remember that’s all it is. Fucking and friendship.”
“Friends with benefits,” I say dryly. “I think I can master that concept.”
Hell, I’d done that plenty of times before over the years as I never quite had the time or the inclination to devote to a true, committed relationship until I met Jamie.
Dane bends down to peer at me a little more closely, seemingly wanting to make sure I believe what I just said. I stare back at him resolutely.
Then he surprises me with a kiss to my cheek and a murmur in my ear. “Have fun tonight, Av. I know I’m going to in The Silo tonight.”
An unbidden, maybe even unwelcomed, throb hits me between my legs at the thought of Dane in The Silo. It was beyond surreal the way Andrew and I watched each other Friday night, but in reality, we didn’t see much in the way of details. There was a woman in front of him obscuring his goods, and Kynan was definitely covering most of me. The intensity of sharing that experience was all in the face and how that pleasure manifested itself there.
I don’t even think to say goodbye to Dane as he pushes past me, although I do turn to briefly watch him walk through the doors that lead to the back rooms. When he’s gone, I turn back to my wine and sip at it lightly for a few minutes as I turn to stare at the liquor bottles behind the shelf to discourage anyone from coming to talk to me.
Dane watched me that night as well. He was somewhere in a private room, watching on a video. Tonight, he didn’t act affronted or weirded out by it. Oddly, for the man who didn’t want to invite me here to begin with, he seems completely okay with me being here now.
I also wonder if that means he’s as open to me watching him as I apparently am to the way he watched me, because it never crossed my mind to chastise him for that or worry it would impact the friendship.
Tilting the glass to my mouth, I take one last swallow of wine before pushing the half-empty cup away from me. I don’t need any fortification, letting my power and initiative drive me forward. Snagging my clutch off the bar top, I turn toward the doors that will lead me to The Silo.
♦
I’d only been in this room once that first night I came here, and it was only to watch the action. But this room out of all of them fascinates me beyond measure. It’s circular with glassed-in rooms around the perimeter where people can have sex. There are fetish rooms, rooms with sex machines, and even rooms that are just mattresses or other furniture to have sex on. It’s where people who want to put on a show and draw a crowd go. The purpose is to titillate and spread the lust around a little.
My eyes scan the rooms, which are all in use. The first room has a raised dais with a silk-covered mattress. In the center are three men having sex. One on his hands and knees while he gets fucked from behind and sucks the other guy’s dick. They’re all three gorgeous, ripped, and tattooed, and I spend a few minutes watching because it’s erotic as well for some reason.
But then I move along the perimeter, checking out the other occupants. I’m intrigued by the one of a woman suspended from a harness in the ceiling while two guys fuck her at the same time, one to her front and the other from behind. As I tilt my head, I realize that both of their cocks are in her pussy at the same time and my eyes go round with the realization that it can happen.
I had no clue.
My eyes go to the woman’s face. She is completely blissed out, moaning and screaming and begging for them to go harder.
Damn… I feel a surge of wetness hit my panties, and I become instantly inflamed with lust.
I spin around, looking at the other patrons in the room. Most are mingling, a few are fucking on some of the couches, or even up at the bar. I don’t see Dane, so I continue to walk the perimeter of the rooms, checking out the other inhabitants.
All of it inciting within me a burning need for something.
And then I see him.