His eyes widened in surprise. “I thought you were going to come back to my place. My mom's out bowling tonight.”
I blinked twice, not really sure how to respond to that. Where in the world had he gotten the idea that I was even remotely interested? I'd said all of three words the entire meal!
“Sorry,” I finally managed to get out. “I can't.”
He stared up at me like a lost puppy, but I wasn't about to fall for those eyes. It might work for his mom, but not for me. Especially after footing an eighty dollar meal after asking for a different restaurant. Luckily, he gave up quickly.
“Well, Hannah, it was really nice to meet you.” He didn't get up from the table to offer me a hug or a handshake, and I was glad. I didn't want to touch him since I wasn't sure of the cleanliness of his hands.
“It's Harper. My name is Harper, not Hannah.” I shouldered my purse and took a step back. “Have a great rest of the night.”
“I'll call you!” he yelled out after me through the quiet restaurant. The other patrons all stopped talking and stared as I walked by. Yup. This was a good date.
I simply waved and hurried out the front door as quickly as possible. Mr. Bathroom was going to make a great post for the Never After Dating series. Right up there with Mr. Small-Time Drug Lord and Mr. Ex-Con Drunk.
At least he hadn't puked on me.
“Hey, I'm on my way,” I told my sister over the phone as I started the car engine. My ancient little Pontiac purred to life and I thanked my lucky stars. Some days she decided to drive like a dream, and on other days she was hell on wheels. Today would have been a terrible day for her not to start. There was no way I was walking back into that restaurant to get a jump start.
“How was the date?” Rosie asked.
“Awful,” I said, pulling out onto the main road. “It'll be great for readers. I really think they're going to eat this one up.”
I could hear her moving around on her end of the phone. “You're the only person I know who gets more excited about bad dates than good ones,” she replied.
“Are you moving stuff around again?” I asked, ignoring her statement.
“No,” she answered defensively before sighing. “Yes. Fine. I'm moving the crib to the other side of the room. I think the draft from the window will make him cold.”
I couldn't help but smile. She was so excited for her first-born child that she had moved that darn crib at least six times in the last week. “You better figure out where to put it soon,” I told her. “You've only got another month to figure it out.”
“Oof-” She was obviously pushing the crib into place. “I know. I can't wait until I don't waddle anymore. I feel like a penguin.”
“A cute penguin,” I said, taking the next turn.
Rosie laughed. “That's what Thomas says, too.” She panted slightly. I was going to have to tell her husband not to let her push that heavy stuff. Not that she'd listen to either of us, but it had to at least be said.
“Okay, well, I'll be there in about five minutes,” I said, pulling off the highway and heading to her place. It was tradition to go see her after a failed date. Rosie had the best perspective and came up with the most epic tag lines for the blog entries.
“Oh good, you'll be here before Mom leaves,” Rosie replied.
“Mom's there?” I asked. I nearly hit the brakes. It wasn't that I didn't like my mother. I loved her a lot. She just hated my blog, my love prospects, and what I was doing with my life. I could already feel the lecture.
“Is that you, Harper?” My mother's voice took over the phone. “I was just getting ready to go, but I'll wait until you get here. I brought the most adorable thing for the baby. You'll love it.”
“Great, Mom.” I wondered if banging my head against the steering wheel would make the airbag deploy. Then I could at least claim I got in an accident and I wouldn't have to explain to my mother, yet again, what I was doing with my life.
I pulled up to the house, making sure not to block my mother's exit in any way shape or form. I actually even parked on the opposite side of the street, just so that she could get out easier. Anything to help her leave as quickly as possible.
I didn't bother knocking. Thomas turned and waved from the living room as I walked in. He was a nerdy-looking guy, all elbows and knees, but he had a great smile. He wasn't my type, but he made my sister happy, so I loved him.
“Hey, Harper,” he said. “How'd the date go? Awful, I hope?”
“Yup. It was perfectly terrible.” I laughed, pausing by the couch to talk to him. “How's doctoring going? Not awful, I hope?”
He smiled. “I'm here and not at the hospital working, so things are good.”
“Are you on call today?” I was stalling. I knew my mother and sister were in the baby's room, but I wasn't ready to face my mother just yet. Maybe I could just talk to Thomas until she had to leave...
“You can't avoid her forever.” Thomas gave me a meaningful, I know what you're doing and it's not going to work, look. “And yes, I'm on call tonight. So don't swallow pennies or any other weird stuff tonight, okay? I want to stay home.”
I chuckled. Thomas was a gastroenterologist at the local hospital. That was how he and Rosie met. Rosie was a radiology technician and the two had fallen in love over a barium x-ray. That was three years ago, and now they were expecting their first child in just a little over a month.
“You sure? Would swallowing pennies get me out of my mother asking me for the upteenth time why my love life is just a bad dates blog?”
Thomas looked thoughtful. “Nope. She'd probably just gown up and keep talking the whole way through your exam. And then she'd try and set you up with the first male nurse that walked in the door.”
I shook my head and chuckled. That would be exactly what my mother would do.
“Harper?” My mother had heard us.
“On my way.” I looked at Thomas. “If you hear screaming, don't come in. Just be prepared to help bury a body.”
“Yours or hers?” Thomas asked.
“I'm not sure. It depends on who grabs the lamp first.”
“Okay,” Thomas agreed. “Just don't use the cute baby elephant lamp. I like that one.”
“No baby elephant lamp, got it.”
I started walking to the baby's room, feeling my shoulders tense up. I told myself to stop it. Maybe this time Mom wouldn't comment. Maybe this time she'd just show me whatever cute baby thing she'd found. Maybe she wouldn't bring up the fact that my younger sister had a real job, a husband, and a baby, while I was writing fluff pieces and wasting my life.
Maybe.
“There you are, Harper,” my mom said as I walked into the baby's room. “I was beginning to think you forgot where the baby's room was.”
“Nope, just talking to the baby daddy,” I replied, going to give my sister and mother each a hug. “So, what did you bring?”
“Isn't it adorable?” My mother held up a little onesie with suspenders and a bow tie printed on it. To be fair, it was absolutely adorable. “I got one with a little tie, too.”