“I don’t trust her. She’ll leave when it gets hard,” Rab growled. As if sensing me, he glared behind him and met my cold gaze.
I shouldn’t have stayed and eavesdropped, but dammit that comment made me mad, and they were talking loud enough for the whole damn group to hear.
“The hell I will!” I shouted, and bounded over to them in long, angry strides, earning the gaze of over a hundred warriors who stood the closest. “You don’t know anything about me. You have no idea what I’m capable of.” I felt my wolf come to the surface then, and Rab spun fully, looking me straight in the eyes.
“Well, little wolf,” he sneered. “Half of our warriors are leaving, and if we get attacked by the Ithaki while they are gone, I will personally hold you responsible for every death.”
Moving warriors from one place to another and leaving the Paladins vulnerable was not ideal, but I had to choose the lesser of two evils. Right now, the city wolves were stuck in a bomb shelter. Clearly that situation was more dire.
“I wouldn’t expect anything less. Now, how can I help here?”
“Demi,” Sage called from behind me, voice thick with concern. “Aren’t you going to even help me lead the warriors back to Wolf City?”
Fuck. I should have told her this morning.
I turned and faced her, tears welling in my eyes. “I … I need to stay here for the time being,” I told my redheaded bestie.
Her eyes widened as she looked behind me at the warriors. “Demi, Wolf City … Sawyer. We need you right now.”
Being torn like this, it was awful. I gestured to the blackened grass at my feet, the dying cornfields off in the distance that I could see even from here were tipped with black char. “No. You want me. But they need me.” I lowered my voice. “I’m going to stay for a few days, talk about next steps with them. I want to earn their trust, do what I can to heal them,” I told her sincerely. She didn’t get it; she didn’t understand these were my people too.
She frowned. “Fine. I’ll stay with you.” She crossed her arms in defiance.
Tears pricked at my eyes as I shook my head. “I need you to lead the warriors to Sawyer. I told him you’re coming.” I tapped my head.
It was early as all hell, we were both exhausted, but war didn’t wait for you to get a good night’s sleep.
“Fine. I’ll drop them off and come right back,” she growled.
“Sage—”
“Stop arguing with me, you stubborn ass. I’m not leaving you here with hotty alphahole over there.” She narrowed her eyes at Rab and I grinned.
Any and all hotness Rab possessed was eaten away by his asshole personality. Besides, I was only interested in Sawyer.
That didn’t mean I couldn’t admire the chiseled bodies every now and then though.
“Alright. See you tonight, then?” I asked.
Her frown grew deeper. “You told Sawyer you’re staying and that I’m going?”
My heart pinched. “It was the worst thing I’d ever had to tell him… But yes. Last night.”
She nodded. “I’ll be back tonight, then, maybe tomorrow.”
We hugged and my throat tightened with emotion. Why did I feel like I wouldn’t see her for a long time? War was ugly, and everything felt so dire on both sides of the border. I hoped I was making the right choice by staying behind with the Paladins. The thing was, the city wolves had Sawyer and these people had no one.
“Be safe,” I told her.
She wiped at her eyes and then walked over to Arrow. “Come on, I’ll show you the way.”
A female warrior stepped up to Arrow, her body nearly as chiseled as his, her breasts covered by a tiny triangle strip of suede that hung from a string that was covered in pretty red beads. She had a deadly grip on her weapon, and I knew instantly that this was Arrow’s mate. He seemed like the type who would go for a warrior woman.
The men started to disperse, and I thought I should say something, give them confidence in my abilities, although I had no idea what would be required of me.
“I won’t let you down,” I said in a strong voice that surprisingly didn’t shake.
The men looked from Astra, back to me, and then nodded, heading off to fight a war they’d never started or believed in.
I stood there, watching every single man and wolf pass by me, and gave them a tight smile. When the last warrior finally turned around the corner, Rab stepped over to me, arms crossed as he pinned me with a glare.
“Three thousand, one hundred and seventy-eight.”
I swallowed hard. “What?”
“That’s how many warriors just left. That’s how many Paladins you have decided to put at risk on your first day as trial alpha.” His eyes flashed yellow.
“Trial alpha?” I crossed my arms and glowered at him. Clearly Arrow was the nice brother. “Last time I checked, I’m the only alpha you got.”
He chuckled, looking over at Astra. “You haven’t told her anything, have you?”
Astra squirmed, adjusting her cream linen top with nervous fingers. “I told her what was important at the time.”
My stomach dropped, and my face must have shown it too, because Rab grinned. “You have no idea what you’re in for, city girl.”
He blasted past me, nearly knocking into me, and I was left staring at Astra with what I hoped she interpreted as a stunned expression.
“Come on. Let’s go in and talk.” She nodded to the large double doors of the giant redbrick church.
I squirmed. Not exactly what I wanted to do right now. But I needed some answers. Following her up the steps, I looked back over my shoulder as the sun began to rise, casting orange, buttery light over the Paladin village. It was so … stunning … and yet … clearly dying. Hundreds of the small redbrick cottages dotted the landscape, all built in straight little rows. In the distance were the open fields. Black sludgy stuff marred the tips of the corn and other crops. The trees looked … ashy … like they had been burned. The plant death covered everything. As Astra led me inside, I did a quick check in with Sawyer.
‘Sage and over three thousand warriors are on their way to you now. I’m going to do my best to help out here today and see if I can get back over to you tomorrow for a visit.’
His reply was immediate. ‘No. It’s too dangerous, just stay there. I’m sending Eugene to protect you. He should reach you in a couple hours.’
I wanted to argue that I didn’t need protecting here, but I knew it would make him feel better to send someone to look after me. It made me sick that neither of us knew when we would see each other again. ‘Alright. Everything okay there?’
It was a stupid thing to ask. What could be okay about a war?
‘My mom, your parents, and Raven’s family are safe. So that’s good.’
That sounded an awful lot like good news-bad news talk.
‘And the bad news?’
I could hear him internally sigh, and desperation bled through our imprint. ‘It’s bad, Demi. I’m glad you’re not here to see the fall of everything my father helped build.’
Oh God. I sagged in the doorway as Astra waited patiently for me to join her inside.
‘Sawyer. Tell me. I can come back. I can help.’