“Huh….” He huffed. “Can’t you just say what you mean?”
I rolled my eyes, wanting to throw my damned phone out the window. “I was. You don’t listen.” Then I paused and did my best to let go of my anger. “I miss Mom too,” I said quietly. Maybe instead of talking around each other, if we found some common ground, he and I could start there. “And I don’t want you to lose the farm either.” As much as I hated to admit it, there was a lot of my own sweat and blood in that place. “What is it you need? I don’t have any money to lend you….”
“I don’t want money. What I need is your help.” He sighed. “I know I have no right to ask for it. Not after the last few years and all… but I’m out of options, and….” I could hear the stubbornness starting to take root inside him. I could almost feel it growing. “You know I never ask for anything, not from anyone.”
“I know.” That was one of the constants in my life. My father would never ask for help from anyone, though he would demand that his son complete his chores no matter what. “What is it you need?” I asked, somewhat against my better judgment.
Dad was silent once more. “Can you come home for a while? I know you have a job there, but I was hoping you could take vacation and maybe….”
I didn’t sigh or explain. “Yes, Dad, I’ll come.” He was my father, and it didn’t matter that I thought him a hard-hearted bastard some of the time, and a pretty much a dick the rest. There had been times when things had been different. Like when my dad had taken me camping. He and I used to fish in the stream that ran through one end of the property. We had fun, just the two of us. “Let me get home, and I’ll pack some things and drive up.” I ended the call before he could ask a bunch of questions I wasn’t prepared to answer, then pulled out into traffic.
It was nearly noon before I turned off the familiar road and into the driveway of the home where I grew up, past maple trees painted in their fall reds and yellows. It had been five years since I’d been back, and the place looked the same, yet different. The buildings seemed older and in need of paint. At least the house seemed the same as it always had.
I pulled to a stop near the house and got out of the car. “Rex?” I asked as a dog ambled up to me. I knelt down, and sure enough, Rex came right over, looking for scratches. He was part yellow lab and part mix, and all loving friend. I petted him and buried my face in his fur, holding him as I tried not to let the memories take too much of a hold. I was here to help my dad and that was it. Rex’s shaggy tail wagged in the dirt, and I pulled back, noticing the gray in his muzzle, and when I stood, he walked back toward the shade to lie down.
Dad stepped into the open back door, and for a second, I didn’t recognize him. He had lost weight, his pants hanging on his hips. His beard was snow white and a bit ragged. But his eyes were the same piercing blue. He had a boot on his foot and propped himself up with crutches. I stared at him, not sure what to say, and he seemed the same.
“Can you drive into town and pick up a couple of prescriptions at Bechtel’s? The doctor says I need to take the damned things….” He tapered off, and I knew what he was going to say anyway. He always hated doctors, and pills were something he avoided at all costs.
“Sure. Why not?” I sighed. It wasn’t as though I was expecting some sort of warm welcome, or even a hug, for Christ’s sake.
“I’ll call them and let them know you’re picking up for me.” He went inside and closed the door.
I shook my head, went back to the car, and held the door to let Rex inside. He always loved to ride. Rex stepped over the driver’s seat and onto the passenger side, his tongue hanging out in doggie happiness. At least someone was pleased to see me.
The drive into town took about ten minutes. I pulled into the pharmacy parking lot, lowered the windows so the fall breeze could flow through the car for Rex, then hurried toward the door and immediately bumped into a brick wall. I shook my head and stepped back.
“Clay?” a familiar voice from my past asked.
I cringed for a second before wiping my face clear and smiling as best I could. “Dell?” I asked with as much enthusiasm as I could muster. In truth, I had planned to avoid Dell while I was in town. I should have known it was too much for me to hope for. I wanted to ask something, but instead ended up staring at him like a fool, my lips going like a demented fish and not saying a word. Dell Warrington had always had that effect on me.
“What are you doing here? I thought you were in Chicago. When I saw him a few months ago, your dad told me that you had a good job there and were doing well.” Those eyes had the same sparkle they had in high school, back when I would gladly follow him around like a puppy. I didn’t tell him that the job and the life that my father was so proud of were gone like a fart in the wind.
“Dad called, and I came back to try to help him.” I wanted to get inside and get the prescriptions before the temperature in my clothes rose any higher and I sweated through everything I was wearing. Damn, I thought I would have gotten past all this. Five years away and never hearing his name, and with one look, I was back to the geekish kid who first left. “I just got into town, and he needed something.” Thank God I found my voice.
“Daddy?” a little boy asked as he stepped from behind Dell’s legs.
“Hey, buddy. This is Grampy Harvey’s son, Clay. He’s an old friend of mine. We went to school together.” He lifted the boy into his arms. “Clay, this is my son, Archie.”
Well, at least that explained a great deal about how things had really been before I had left. I spent the last two years of high school mooning over Dell because… look at him. They guy was carved out of granite, with eyes that burned like lightning.
“It’s good to meet you.” I smiled at the young boy and got a grin in return.
“We need to get back to Grandma’s before she wonders if we’ve gotten lost.” Dell stepped out of the way, and I should have gone inside. He turned, heading down the sidewalk, and I followed him with my gaze. Then, with a sigh, I was just about to turn away when Dell looked back over his shoulder, his gaze meeting mine. I smiled, and he did the same before continuing down the sidewalk.
I went inside, berating myself for the way my heart beat a little faster just because he’d looked back at me. I told myself I wasn’t going to fall back into the old habits that had left my heart ripped in two and me unable to look myself in the mirror. If I were honest, I probably would have stayed here regardless of how things had been with my dad if Dell had felt the way about me that I did for him. But there was no use going over all that mess for the millionth time.
I approached the pharmacy counter, explained what I needed, and stepped back while he got Dad’s prescriptions. They added the cost to Dad’s account, and I headed for my car, anxious to return to the farm and figure out exactly what kind of mess I was walking into.
“Clay,” Dell called, and I looked around as he and Archie approached.
“We’re gonna get ice cream. Daddy promised,” Archie said with a wild-eyed grin as though he were checking that Dell remembered.
“Would you like to join us?” Dell asked.