My family is huge and so full of love. I think that’s why I struggle so much with how I’ve let myself go. Yes, everyone has gained weight, especially the women, but they had kids and they’re happy. I’m a stressed-out college student who was almost raped and has really bad biological daddy issues. I just feel like I should be doing better. I come from greatness, but I’m not even an ounce of great. It’s depressing, and I hate how in the shitter my confidence is.
Within seconds, everyone in the chat is gushing over them and how excited they are to meet the new baby. Jude and Claire live in Florida, only hours from my other uncle Jace and his wife Avery and their two kids. My uncle Jayden and his wife Baylor live with their kids down the road from my grandma. Jayden is the captain of the Nashville Assassins hockey team, though he’s getting over a really awful injury right now. He broke four ribs, one punctured his lung, and then he got an infection. They’re hoping he’ll be back by next season. I’m just thankful he’s alive. I don’t know who my favorite uncle is, but Jayden is up there. He’s just so supportive and loving.
I send a heart emoji, and almost automatically, my mom, dad, and grandma all love my comment. Then a text comes in just to me from my mom.
Mom: Hey, baby. I hope you’re having a nice day. I saw your grades. I’m so over-the-top proud of you. Please let us know when graduation is. I love you. So much.
Then one from my dad.
Dad: I love you, Paxy. Great job on those grades. Hope to see you soon.
I bite my lip and write them both back that I love them too.
I don’t think I’ll walk for graduation, but before I can even think much about it, my iPad dings with a notification that Evan Adler is here. I take in a deep, long breath, blowing it out in a whoosh. I’ve been dreading this all day. I honestly don’t know what is about to happen, but my heart hurts for him.
I glance around the room he’ll be in, making sure it’s clean and ready, before heading out to the waiting room. It’s not really a waiting room, though. It’s more of a hanging-out spot. It has cool couches and chairs, a huge TV, and lots of snacks. Even the examination room he’ll be in doesn’t seem like a typical exam room. It, too, has couches but really no medical supplies in it. We have an equipment cart that we bring around when needed so that our patients feel calm. Doctor anxiety is a real thing, and we try to keep the players/patients comfortable.
I open the door to the waiting room to find not only Evan, but Owen sitting beside him.
Good God.
I haven’t seen him in years. I deleted my social media when I moved, so I haven’t even caught a glimpse of him on there. I actually find myself overwhelmed by him. Even sitting down, he’s massive. His legs are so long, and he wears some high-top Converses with high black socks. His thighs are thick, the fabric of his shorts stretching over his skin. He’s wearing an oversized T-shirt, but even so, I can see how thick he is. His shoulders are wide and his arms so strong. His eyes are such a bright blue, brighter than Evan’s, and his face is rounder. His lashes are dark and long, but what really gets my engine revving is his lips. Juicy as hell and copious. I tear my eyes from them, taking in his flowing hair that he’s tucked back under an IceCats ball cap.
Fucking hell, when did he get so gorgeous?
Evan looks up at me before I can call his name, and he smiles. He smacks Owen, who looks up as Evan stands. Owen’s eyes fall on me, and I can see that he thinks he knows me, but he isn’t sure. He stands slowly, taking me in, and I feel so self-conscious under his inspection. His gaze is ruthless, staring at me, moving over my body and meeting my eyes head on. His brows rise, and I see him whisper something to Evan. His twin looks back to him with an expression on his face that I don’t understand before he says something that really makes Owen’s eyes widen.
Probably something along the lines of, “Yeah. Remember Angie Paxton? That’s her. She’s super fat now.”
Ugh, I hate that I do that to myself.
I look down at my iPad, alerting the doctor that I’m bringing Evan back. “Hey, Evan.”
“Hey, Angie. How are you?”
“Good,” I say, opening the door so they both can enter.
Evan slings his thumb back to his brother. “You remember my brother Owen?”
I nod, and like a dumbass, I meet Owen’s gaze. His eyes are so blue, I want to float on them like a cloud. He doesn’t smile, nor does he say anything; he just stares at me. “Oh yeah, I remember Owen. How are you?”
He nods. “I’m all right. It’s good to see you.”
I force a polite smile. “Same.”
He looks away then, dismissing me basically, and I shouldn’t be surprised.
While I may think Owen Adler is beyond hot, like the hottest man I’ve laid eyes on in a very long time, he would never think the same of me.
Chapter Four
Owen
* * *
I am a ball of nerves, fear, and anxiety.
Even after calling my mom, I’m still a mess. I think she knows Evan is about to come home, and she is all for it. She’s always been super attentive to Evan. Always been more in tune with his feelings than the rest of us. I mean, don’t get me wrong—I know my brother inside and out, and I know when he’s struggling. But my mom just knows when he needs extra support or love. I’m consistent in that department, and I know when I need to be there for him more, but I don’t think I’m prepared for what is about to happen. I don’t want to accept that he’s done. I don’t even want to think about it. I spent the night watching him and getting no sleep because I am so wound up over this appointment.
To my surprise, though, there is a welcome distraction from the shitshow my life is about to become.
Paxy.
Being a Nashville Assassins’ kid, especially the owner’s and captain’s kid, I knew everyone. Yes, there are a ton of players and staff, but we really are a family. Even players who moved on due to trades or retirement, I still keep in contact with their kids. We grew up together, cheering on the best team in the NHL. Our box in the arena was always full, and we had a blast.
Everyone got along, and everyone loved me—except for Angie Paxton. She never liked me. Never talked to me or even acknowledged me. We would be in the same room, on the same couch, and she would completely ignore me. She loved Evan; they hung out, and there were rumors of them dating for a bit there, but they never did.
It was crazy, but I did everything to not let it bother me. While I found her hot and so damn funny and I wanted to get with her, I wouldn’t waste my time. I had plenty of girls who wanted to date me; it didn’t matter that Paxy didn’t want me. Or at least, that’s what I told myself. In truth, it did bother me. I didn’t get it. She wouldn’t even look at me. Well, I take that back. There was one time. She caught me on a face-off and knocked me on my ass. She looked me right in the eye and told me never to forget her name.
And I never did.
But then Paxy fell off the grid. She deleted all her social media, moved, and stopped coming to events for the Assassins. She didn’t even come to my sister’s wedding. The biggest event of the year. I don’t know if Shelli noticed, but I sure did. I remember my mom talking to Lucy, Paxy’s mom, but all she said was Paxy was really focused on work and school. I didn’t even know she was here until Evan told me she was working for the organization. It’s a pretty impressive job to be working on the mental health team of the IceCats facility, but I’m not surprised. She’s always been super smart, and she was a super-talented hockey player. She got hurt, though, and moved on to volleyball. I, for one, enjoyed watching her in those short shorts.