* * *
"Momma." I hear Sofia's voice. “Are you here?"
* * *
Looking over at the barn, I get up and walk back to the door. “Let’s get this shit over with."
Chapter 5
Reed
"Come on." Ethan smirks. “You got more in you than that,” he says as he stands over me and pushes me to do another set of eight. My arm muscles scream at me as I push up the last one. I lock the weights in place as my arms fall to the sides, and my eyes close.
"That’s enough." I hear Ethan snickering, and I sit up, grabbing my water bottle and drinking from it as my chest heaves.
"What, are you tired?" I tease, and he looks over his shoulder at me. He was not lying when he said he would make me vomit. He pushed me so hard that when I went home, I took a shower sitting down. I got myself something to eat and then collapsed into bed. The dreams never came, and I wonder if it was because I was that exhausted. Whatever it was, it was the first time in over a month I didn’t have a nightmare.
"I still got a couple of hours left in me,” I say, and my whole body clenches in fear.
"Good,” he says. “You can run all that energy off." He points at the treadmills. When Ethan came back home all those years ago, my dad made sure he felt at home. He transformed an old fallen-down barn into a state-of-the-art training facility. The walls are covered in mirrors so you can see what you’re doing. The middle of the barn has ten weight machines in the shape of a square that work your core. Five bikes on one side of the wall sit right next to five Stairmasters. Two leg press machines are against the other wall with three punching bags and five treadmills. An empty space all the way at the end has two ropes lying on the floor. I get on the treadmill and run for over forty-five minutes before turning it off and deciding I’m done for the day.
"I’m going to shower and go see Grandpa,” I say, and he looks over at me.
Out of everyone, he’s the one who has been in my face about things. "Doing visits." He stands with his feet apart and his arms crossed over his chest.
"I saw Quinn yesterday,” I say, and he rolls his eyes at me.
"He came to see if it was really you." He points at me and then stares me down. "Why do you hate being here so much?" He doesn’t mess with words or sugarcoat anything.
"I don’t hate it here,” I say and then look at him. “My whole life, I was Casey’s son. The big cowboy tech specialist. In high school, I failed computers. Do you know how that felt? It’s like they thought I was my father,” I say. “Then it was Quinn’s little brother. Can you ride horses like Quinn? Can you walk with the stupid swagger that he walks with?" I make up that last part, and Ethan laughs. “I was never just fucking Reed. Pain in the ass, funny, good-looking Reed." I wink at him, trying to make a joke of it.
"Who the fuck told you that you were good-looking?" He shakes his head, and it’s my turn to flip him the bird.
"Day one of training." I lift my hand. “Not one person compared me to anyone. I was just Barnes."
"So did you find out who you were?" he asks, and I look down. "You know who you are," he tells me, walking over and grabbing his truck keys. “It’s time to show everyone else." He heads toward the door, sliding on his sunglasses. “And put on a fucking shirt. You aren’t a stripper."
I clap my hands. “Don’t be envious that I’m better built than you are." He walks out, not saying a word, so I grab my shirt and head back to the house, which is ten steps from the barn.
I shower quickly and slip on jeans and a T-shirt. Grabbing my phone, I see I have a call from my mother and then another couple of texts from some of the guys in my squad. I’ll get to those later. Tucking my phone in my back pocket, I make my way over to my grandparents' house. I put my glasses on and wonder if I should take the golf cart to their house or just walk it. Everyone in my family is five minutes away from each other. I opt to take the golf cart when my leg twinges because the path to my grandparents’ place is smooth.
When I finally see their house, my chest aches because I spent more time here than in my own. This house brought me so many memories. Every Sunday, my grandparents host a barbecue for the town. When I was growing up, it was my favorite day of the week. The day of the week I found out my brother was better than me at everything. The day of the week I would pretend I didn’t care, yet inside, a piece of me died every single fucking time.
I spot my grandfather right away as he walks out of his barn, talking to the guy next to him. My grandfather is in jeans, a button-down shirt, worn cowboy boots, and his cowboy hat on his head.
It takes him a couple of minutes to look over at me, but when he does, his face fills with a giant smile, and I can’t help but mirror his look. Stopping the golf cart, I get out and walk over to him. “Finally,” he says. Coming to me, he grabs my neck and pulls me to him. I hug him just like I did six years ago when I left. “Took you long enough." After slapping my back, he lets me go. His eyes are on mine. “It’s been two days."
"I know,” I say. The guilt washes over me when he lets me go, and I look over at the man next to him.
"Christopher?" I ask, confused, and he just smirks at me. He’s wearing dress pants, a button-up shirt, and a sport coat.
"Son of a bitch,” he says, laughing. “Never thought I’d see this ugly face again." He looks back at my grandfather. “Sorry for swearing." We are twenty-five years old and still afraid to swear in front of my grandfather.
"Me?" I say, pointing at myself. “What the fuck are you wearing?"
"I had patients today,” he says, and I look at him confused.
"Patients?" I question him. When I left town, he was headed to community college to go into agriculture.
"It’s Doctor now,” he says to me, and I just look at him shocked. "I was here to see if my girl could start riding."
"Your girl?" It’s only then that I realize how much has changed and how much of a stranger everyone is to me. In shutting myself off from them, I realize how much I missed out on their lives.
"She just turned two,” he says, and I hit his shoulder, just like I used to do all those years ago.
"Shut up,” I say. “A doctor, a husband, and a father."
"Not the husband part,” he says. “Two out of three isn’t so bad." He looks at my grandfather and then back at me. “Why don’t we catch up soon?" he says, and I nod at him as he walks over to his brand-new BMW.
"Doctor?" I say, shocked. “Harlow broke her arm once." I watch him drive away. “He threw up on her."
"People change," my grandfather says, and I look over at him, nodding.
"Don’t I know it,” I say, and he puts his hand on my shoulder.
"It’s good to have you home," he says, and the guilt slowly comes back.
"It’s just a visit,” I say, and he nods.
"You came." He squeezes my shoulder.