After a few minutes, Eva stuck out her hand in a silent demand, and Keith handed her the book so she could take her turn.
Serena’s heart ached in her chest as she watched. She wasn’t sure why the little scene moved her so much. It wasn’t new or unusual or particularly sentimental.
In fact, it felt familiar. Like a truth she’d always known that was only now coming to the surface.
Eva’s big brown eyes followed the words on the page as she read, and occasionally they lifted to check and make sure Keith was listening attentively.
He was. Of course he was. He spent more time with Eva and took her more seriously than the girl’s own father did. Lately Scott had been busy with his new girlfriend and only wanted one weekend a month with his daughter even though their agreement allowed him two.
Just then, Keith glanced back over his shoulder as if he sensed her presence. He gave her a little smile—surprised and pleased—as if seeing her unexpectedly made him happy.
Her heart squeezed with feeling as she smiled back. In a lot of ways, he was the bedrock of her life. She really wasn’t sure what she would do without him.
“I’m reading,” Eva pronounced with a frown. “Not Mommy.”
“Sorry,” Keith said, turning back quickly. “Just checking to see if she was spying on us.”
“Why are you spying on us, Mommy?”
“I just wanted to hear what was happening in the book. I’ll only listen a minute, and then I have to go do the dishes.”
“Okay,” Eva said with great condescension. “You can stay for a little while.”
Serena smothered a smile, and she could see Keith was doing the same thing. He made an impressive attempt to keep his face sober so only Serena knew he was laughing inside.
After another minute, Serena’s heart became dangerously full, so she turned and walked back down the hall toward the kitchen. They’d left the pile of dirty dishes in the sink, and she hated to have them waiting in the morning, so she always did them the same night.
She’d gotten through loading the plates and cups into the dishwasher and was working on the pizza pan when she sensed Keith coming into the kitchen behind her. “Is she reading?”
“Yes. The timer starts at 8:06.” Keith moved beside her and picked up the pan she’d just rinsed so he could dry it.
Eva got twenty minutes every night to read on her own before the lights went out, and they timed it down to the minute, so Serena appreciated Keith noting the exact time.
“Thanks for spending so much time with her,” Serena said, nudging him with her elbow as she rinsed the cheese and grease off the pizza cutter.
“I like spending time with her.” Keith sounded faintly surprised.
“I’m glad. I’m really happy you’re in her life, especially since she only has an on-and-off relationship with her dad.”
Keith snarled slightly and didn’t say anything. Keith held utter disdain for Scott, and it was no more than her ex-husband deserved.
The only thing left to wash was the pan Keith had fried up some bacon in earlier. Both of them reached for it at the same time.
“I’ll get it,” Keith said, trying to edge her out of the way.
“No! You’ve already done more than enough for the day. I can wash the pan.”
“I said I’d do it,” he grumbled.
He was usually a laid-back, easygoing man, but he had a stubborn streak that arose unexpectedly. He wouldn’t back down, not even on this trivial issue, and they ended up having a silly little scuffle over the pan.
He finally wrested it out of her hands and started to scrub it out while she huffed.
She saw his lip twitching with suppressed humor as he did.
Despite her defeat, she wanted to laugh in response to his expression. Instead, she took the sprayer from its position on the sink and sprayed water right in his face.
He yelped and tried to grab the sprayer to get her back. They both ended up wet and laughing, and Serena fell against his chest as the amusement rippled through her.
His arms had gone around her, and they felt strong and solid and safe. His chest did too. He smelled like dish soap and garlic and laundry. Her blood started to pulse in her veins as she was suddenly aware of his body, his humanness. How touchable he was.
She straightened up before she did something stupid, and her breath hitched when she looked up and saw the expression on his face.
His brown eyes were deep and full of emotion. Some sort of soulful feeling. It felt like yearning, longing, need, hunger, and it awoke a matching feeling inside her.
They gazed at each other for a few endless seconds. His arms had loosened so that his hands were resting lightly on her hips. She had her fingers clutched in his shirt. She wasn’t sure how or why they’d gotten there.
And she wanted him so much. Wanted him more than made any sense.
She could feel her heart beating in her chest, her head, her hands. Between her legs. She knew she was flushed, and she could only imagine what the look in her eyes was at the moment.
Hopefully it wasn’t conveying what she was feeling right now.
That wouldn’t do at all.
With a sudden flare of fear, she stepped back and dropped her eyes.
“Serena.” Keith’s voice was thick and gruff. It made her shiver.
“Keith, don’t.” She swallowed hard and fought against the surge of feeling.
“Don’t what?”
She wasn’t sure how to describe the moment before, but she tried. “Don’t look that way.”
“I’m not sure I’m entirely in control of the way I look.” His voice wasn’t so textured anymore. It sounded almost gentle.
“I know. But... but don’t look that way.” She was still looking down, but she heard him let out a breath.
“How was I looking?”
“Like... like...” Yearning. Longing. Like he wanted something desperately. “Like you’re not... not happy. Like you don’t have everything you want.”
That wasn’t exactly right, but it was as close as she could articulate without curling up into a ball of mortification.
“No one has everything they want, Serena.”
“I do. I’m perfectly happy right now, and I’m really scared of messing it up. But I want you to be just as happy.” She finally had the courage to look up and see his expression. It wasn’t terrifying anymore.
It was his normal clever, dryly amused self. “I’m doing pretty well for myself. You don’t have to worry about me.”
His words were a relief, but the moment before had really rattled her. “I do worry about you. I can’t help it. I’m a worrier, and I care about you a lot.”
“Well, I care about you too. And I think we’re both doing just fine as long as you don’t try to control how I look.” He made the words lighter by the slight quiver of his lips.
She stuck her tongue out at him, but his comment had broken the tension completely. She gave him a quick hug and started the dishwasher and then went to kiss Eva good night and turn off the light.
It was fine. Everything was fine. She and Keith were still good.
And a passing look didn’t mean that much. It could have been prompted by anything.
It didn’t have to mean what she’d thought it might.
It didn’t have to mean that at all.