Like my mother has always made me feel.
“All that matters is that he chose you,” Evie adds. “That he loves you. That he wants your pussy for the rest of his life.”
I burst out laughing.
This is one of the many reasons these girls are my family, my soul mates. No matter what happens in my life, they have my back.
When I told them I’d agreed to marry my now-ex, Jeremy, after only a few months, they offered their unwavering support, once they made sure it was what I wanted. It wasn’t, but that didn’t make them turn their backs. It only made them support me even more.
When I told them I’d discovered Jeremy in bed with another man, they helped me drown my sorrows in a bottle of wine. Not once did they question what I did to make Jeremy stray, like my mother did. They happily helped me navigate my divorce.
And once my divorce was finalized, they threw me a party to celebrate the next stage of my life. It was at that party they opened my eyes to the fact I married Jeremy to try and patch a wound that still hadn’t healed.
That I was still holding onto Hunter.
That I needed to let him go in order to find the happiness I deserved.
So I set out to do just that. Never did I expect to meet a man like Anderson along the way.
I truly believe some higher power played a hand in our meeting. Knew that we were two lost souls in need of something… In need of each other.
When I glance across the room to where he laughs and jokes with Lincoln, Asher, and Julian, my heart expands. Over the past months, they’ve welcomed him into their fold, treating him like he’s just one of the guys, not the heir to the throne of the European Nation of Belmont.
I hope that doesn’t change.
As if able to sense me staring, his eyes find mine. Every time our gazes lock like this, it feels like the first time I glanced up in a Downtown Chicago diner to see him staring at me. I still feel my surprise when I left the pool at my motel on Route 66 and ran into him…literally. I still feel the awe and wonder when he told me I was beautiful the first time.
It’s these mundane events that will always hold a special place in my heart. The foundation of who we are as a couple. I have to believe these building blocks of our relationship are strong enough to help us navigate the uncertainty of our future.
At least the uncertainty of my future.
Anderson’s future has been written since he was born. I just hope there’s a place in it for me, too.
“Can I have your attention please?” Evie calls out.
I snap my gaze to where she stands in the center of the room, the picture of the perfect hostess.
“It’s not an engagement party without a toast.” She nods at Izzy, who walks around with a tray, offering a glass to everyone, specifying which ones have alcohol and which don’t.
Anderson approaches with two flutes, extending one toward me. “One tiny sip won’t hurt,” he murmurs so no one can hear as I wrap my fingers around the flute.
I nod in agreement. He isn’t a big drinker these days. Not after his doctors recommended avoiding alcohol to help prevent any multiple sclerosis flareups.
“Okay, you love birds,” Chloe teases. “If you can keep your hands off each other for a minute or two, I’d like to say a few words.”
He pulls away, but keeps me in his embrace, a finger tracing a light circle on my bicep. It’s a simple gesture, but it still lights me on fire. It doesn’t help I thought we’d be having sex once we got back here, not walking into a surprise engagement party. Talk about being cock blocked. Or, in my case, clam jammed.
“I met Nora during our freshman year of college,” Chloe begins, a nostalgic smile on her face. “We were both scared. Both in a strange place. Both forced to grow up pretty damn quickly, although the jury’s still out on whether we’ve succeeded in that.”
“Growing up is overrated,” Anderson states with a chuckle.
“I’ll drink to that.” Evie raises her glass but doesn’t take a sip.
“As her roommate,” Chloe continues, “I witnessed a lot of her ups and downs. I was there when she got home from that first date with Hunter. I listened to her gush and swoon over everything he did and said. At the time, I was convinced they were soul mates.” She pauses. “Until she FaceTimed me and told me she’d agreed to travel Route 66 with a complete stranger after her rental car broke down.” Her eyes lock with mine. “You may have just met him, may not have known anything about him, but in those few moments, I knew this was different. Knew this man would change everything. Knew you’d found your true soul mate.”
She smiles at me before clearing her throat and turning to address everyone else once more.
“They say most people fall in love three times during their lifetimes. That each of these loves serves a different purpose.”
Evie appears quite pleased by this, considering her obsession with the number three.
“Your first love typically happens when you’re young. Around high school.” Chloe gives me a pointed look, and I know all too well to whom she’s referring.
Now that I’m older, I consider my first love to be Hunter, but before him was Aaron, my high school sweetheart. And the person I was dating when I got a wrong number text from Hunter.
“While this love is more akin to infatuation, you can’t dismiss it altogether. This first love teaches you what love can be. It’s not all-consuming. It’s merely your first exposure to this strange sensation. Think about the ocean. It’s like dipping your toes into the water to test it, but you don’t venture out too far yet.
“Now, your second love is challenging. This is the one that teaches us what a broken heart feels like. Teaches us lessons about life. Makes us stronger. In this second love, there’s great pain.” She swallows hard, her expression falling. “And great loss. But with this love, we grow. We learn more about love. What it’s like to fall in love. What it’s like to lose that love. Because we experienced this second, heartbreaking love, we’re able to figure out who we are and what we want in life. We’re finally ready to experience real love.”
Anderson pulls me closer as I swallow past the lump in my throat over the reminder of Hunter. Of exploding with joy when he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. Of planning our life together. Of losing him and our unborn baby in the car accident I survived.
Of the years I spent wishing I hadn’t.
“And that brings us to the third love.” Her expression and tone brighten. “This is the love that takes you by surprise. Finds you when you least expect it. Probably at a time in your life when love is the last thing you want. You fight it with everything you have. But before you know it, you can’t imagine your life without this person, even though you barely know a thing about them.”
She lifts her gaze to Lincoln, who towers over her by more than a foot. On the outside, they’re as different as two people can be. But outward differences don’t matter where the heart is concerned. I’ve learned that lesson with Anderson.
“You somehow find the ability to look past all his imperfections, all his faults.” She pauses, then adds. “All his regrets.”
I nod, swiping at the tears sliding down my cheek.
“At the end of the day, those things don’t matter. All that does is the understanding in your heart that you’ve finally arrived. That you’ve finally found peace. That you’ve finally found a home. And no matter where you go, no matter the miles you travel, as long as you’re together, you will be home.”