“Quinn.” His mouth was set in a firm line, causing his usually plush lips to thin.
I squinted at him, taking off the gloves and hitting them together, little specks of soil flying off of them. Colt took a step back and I smirked. “I don’t know a Quinn.”
The scowl on his face morphed into confusion. “She said…” His eyes snapped to something behind me. “You told me she was expecting you.”
“I needed a ride,” a small voice said. I spun around, my gaze landing on the blond girl in my yard. She looked up from her purple tennis shoes, the same shade as my blooming hyacinths, and her blue-eyed gaze met mine, stealing the air from my lungs. My ears filled with noise, and the blood drained from my face. Pain pierced through my heart as I stared at the eyes of Declan. I brought my hand up to my mouth and might have crashed to my knees if Colt hadn’t steadied me.
My daughter stood in front of me. I couldn’t take in her features fast enough. Her hair was mine, the same shade mine had been at that age. So bright and blond. I wondered if hers would tone down and darken a bit as she went into her teenage years. The hair was all she had inherited from me; the rest was Declan. From the blue eyes to the pronounced cupid’s bow, she was the spitting image of Declan.
“Wha—? How? I—I—” It was impossible to form a coherent thought. My heart was splintering inside my chest, and it was so hard to breathe. So freaking hard to breathe. Colt had his arm wrapped around my waist, completely holding me up now. I would’ve been on the ground without him. My knees and face in the dirt.
“Let’s go inside, Mak,” Colt whispered in my ear. “Come on, let’s go inside.”
He guided me slowly up the steps of the porch, but I was looking over my shoulder at my daughter…Quinn. Quinn.
That was a beautiful name. A tear dripped down my cheek, fell off my chin, and splashed on my chest. Quinn followed us, staring back at me, her gaze unwavering behind those purple frames.
Was it fate? Or a coincidence that Quinn showed up on my doorstep as I tended to the purple hyacinths? The ones that meant sorrow and forgiveness. I’d always felt sorrow when I thought of the daughter I’d given up for adoption, and I’d known I might need to seek forgiveness if she ever thought to come and find me. Even though it was a closed adoption, her parents had my information. I knew she lived in Texas, somewhere in the hill country, but I didn’t know where. Or how she was. Except for the wonderful and beautiful life I imagined for her when I chose her parents. When I chose them over me because they could give her everything I couldn’t as a broken eighteen-year-old.
Colt set me in a chair at my kitchen table, and Quinn sat in the chair beside me. Colt was on my other side, scooting his chair closer to mine and putting an arm around the back of me, still keeping me steady. Still keeping me upright. He was made of steel, built to withstand a storm.
“Quinn,” he said in his deep timbre. “You told me she knew you were coming.”
Quinn winced, finally breaking eye contact with me and staring down at her hands in her lap, her fingers fiddling together. I laid my hand over hers, sucking in a lungful of air. She was real and she was here. “It’s okay,” I whispered. “I was just taken by surprise. You look so much like your…” My voice cracked and my throat felt raw, “Like Declan.”
“I read in the file that he died,” she said. “Is that true?”
I ground my back molars together, nodding once. “Yes, that’s true.”
“Is that why you gave me up?”
I winced, that flashing hot, whiplike pain lancing through me. “I—I don’t like to think of it like that. I…” I cocked my head to the side, staring at her. She was twelve. I glanced around the kitchen, making sure I hadn’t missed her parents coming inside with her and, honestly, I wouldn’t have been surprised with the state I was in. Then I remembered that Colt said he gave her a ride. “How did you get here? Where are your parents?” The last word hurt to speak, but I wasn’t her parent. I gave her life and I would love her every second of my life, but I didn’t have the honor of raising her or of being “Mom.”
“I saw her getting off the bus. She looked lost, so I approached. She told me she was looking for her birth mom and that you were expecting her.”
I snorted and chuckled. That tenacity and determined stubbornness to get what she wanted was a combination of Declan and me. “I think you can tell by my reaction that I didn’t know Quinn was coming.” I squeezed her hand. “Not that I don’t want to see you. It was a surprise and I need to know where your parents are. Did you ride the bus by yourself? Are you allowed to do that?”
She winced. “Not exactly. My parents are out of town and my grandma is watching me. She doesn’t know where I am. I told her I was going to my friend Cara’s house. I rode my bike to the bus station and came here.”
“Oh, Quinn. We need to call your parents.”
“No! Please! I don’t want to get in trouble.”
I licked my lips, afraid to ask what kind of trouble. My gaze found Colt’s, and I could see the same question in his eyes. “What would happen if you got in trouble?”
“I’ll be grounded for like two weeks,” she said as if that would last forever. “I won’t be able to play on my computer or go to Cara’s house.”
“What if I ask your parents, just this once, to not ground you? Maybe that’ll work? But, I’m sorry, you can’t be here without them knowing. It isn’t okay.”
“I have so many questions though.”
I nodded. “I understand. I really do, but they have to know where you are and I’d really like to speak with them.”
“If they let me see you, will you let me ask you questions?”
I nodded.
I couldn’t believe that in the span of a couple of weeks, I had two family members that wanted to know more. This was a hugely different situation than with Chase, but it was something I hadn’t prepared for. Someone no one knew. Not Zoe. Not Delilah. Not…Gunner. Who would know who this girl belonged to with one look. There was no hiding that she was related to Declan. I rubbed a hand over my chest.
And now Colt knew my secret. A secret I’d have to beg him to keep and something I didn’t want to tell him more about. I knew him. He was inquisitive and wouldn’t stop until he had me spilling every last piece of my soul.
6
Colt
I’d slept like shit last night. No matter which way I tossed or turned, my mind wouldn’t quiet down. Makenna was there front and center. If I was being honest, it wasn’t the usual way she’d pop into my mind late at night. This was entirely different. The heartache and devastation that laced her features when she saw Quinn haunted me.
I’d seen Makenna laugh. Smile. Drunk. Sleepy. And madder than hell. I’d even seen her sad a time or two. When something happened to someone she cared about or when she thought no one was watching her, occasionally a sad, far off look would pop into her eyes for a few moments before she wrangled it back in and sealed a smile on her pretty lips. Through the years I’d known her, and had been unable to pry my gaze away from her beauty, as much as I tried, I’d never seen that type of devastation. It was like she was being ripped apart in front of me.