She smiles widely. “A dynasty? Ha! Wouldn’t that be cool? I’m the matriarch of course. You can be my right-hand woman, helping me keep order.”
I swallow over the lump of emotion lodged in my throat. I’m well aware my friends are moving on to a new phase of life. I just never thought I would feel so very alone in the midst of the closest thing I have to a real family.
I look toward the door, where Eli just left. The man who had a crush on me finally asked me out, and I rejected him. Not only that, I dented his brand-new car. No wonder he walked out. He must hate me.
The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them. “Eli’s a good guy. I feel awful.”
“Why?”
I can’t share that I turned him down. It’ll bring up too many questions, and then she’ll know I’m lusting for her brother. I can get over lust, I assure myself. It’s good that I nipped this in the bud before anything got too complicated.
I let out a breath. “I don’t know. Because of his car and because he’s being so nice about it.”
“What’s wrong with him being nice about it?”
My eyes get hot. “Nothing.” I shake my head. “I have to go.”
I grab my purse and head toward the door with a quick bye over my shoulder.
“Jenna.”
I wiggle my fingers in the air, unable to face her when my throat’s tight, my eyes hot. It’s just too much, being left behind while my friends move forward with their lives. And as crazy as it seems, I feel like I screwed up turning Eli down.
But what choice did I have?
I yank open the front door, get in my car, and make the short drive back to my apartment. I only survived my parents’ divorce because of my girlfriends. I let them in close and no one else. Too risky. I was eleven when the dust finally settled between my parents after a two-year ordeal, where my sister and I were caught in a tug of war between them. They even fought over the dog, my beloved lab mix, Charlie, before giving him away because they couldn’t agree on who got to keep him. My dog! I loved that dog. He was my only comfort at the time, licking my face and leaning against me with his warm furry body in his own form of a doggy hug. I still miss him.
My younger sister, Evie, and I had to go before a judge and decide who we wanted to live with. I chose Mom; Evie chose Dad. I tried to get Evie to stay with me, but she only wanted Dad. I haven’t been close with her since.
That’s why Sydney means so much to me. She was my sister when my own sister abandoned me. Sometimes it feels like my entire family abandoned me.
And now even my honorary sisters are abandoning me for their own families.
I wipe my eyes. Some part of me doesn’t believe I deserve love. I’m too damaged. It’s a fact I’ve accepted, and I’ve never regretted pushing any guy away. Until today.
4
Eli
Friends. If that’s what Jenna wants, we can be friends who ignore the attraction between us. Oh, yeah, I saw the lust in her eyes yesterday at lunch, the flush to her cheeks, the warmth in her voice as she leaned across the table. I know when someone wants me. So now we’ll be friends, both knowing there’s a mutual attraction.
I walk down Peaceable Lane, heading to her shop for a friendly visit, as I said I would. She noticed I was avoiding her, and she was pissed about it. Not one mention of my note. It seems the obvious embarrassing reason someone might want to preserve their dignity. Didn’t it mean anything to her? Well, I’m not bringing it up this late in the game. I’m just going to right the wrong, make a quick visit to her shop, and then we can move past all that. As friends.
I slow my walk, taking in her shop. There’s a painted red wooden sign over the front door that reads Summerdale Sweets in bold white letters, dark green awnings over picture windows, and two park benches right out front to encourage people to linger. It looks inviting. The shop’s on the lower level of a white square building in the “downtown” area of Summerdale. If you could call a post office, small grocery store, The Horseman Inn, Jenna’s shop, the library, and two churches at opposite ends of a long winding street a downtown. The streets are laid out like wavy spokes on a wheel radiating out from Lake Summerdale. The hippy founders worked around trees when making the streets, and they gave the streets groovy names: Peaceable Lane, Lovers’ Lane, Sunset Lane, Harmony Lane, and Schoolhouse Lane. The road around the lake is Lakeshore Drive. Just on the edge of town is Route 15 leading out into the big bad world.
I open the door to Summerdale Sweets, and the bell above it jingles. It’s Wednesday afternoon, and Jenna’s busy with a couple of teenaged girls, so she doesn’t notice me at first over their loud chatter trying to decide what kind of brownie to split. Jenna’s dark green apron over a black turtleneck and black skinny jeans are a striking contrast to her blond hair and fair skin. Beautiful. An all-too-familiar lust rushes through my system.
She notices me, her green eyes widening. “Eli, this is a surprise.”
“I thought I’d check out your place.”
She nods and turns to the girls. “Salted caramel brownie is our bestseller. Can’t go wrong.”
The girls—a brunette and redhead—confer in a silent exchange of looks before turning back to her, saying in unison, “We’ll take it.” I recognize them now. Anna and Christina. Their families have been here for about three years now, ever since our regional high school was rated best in the state. I assist with security at the high school football games, which draw a large enthusiastic crowd, as well as visit the school regularly to discuss the dangers of drunk driving, staying off drugs, and also letting them know resources they can turn to for help, including me.
The girls pool their money to pay and turn to go.
“Hi, Officer Robinson,” Anna, the brunette, says.
“Hi,” Christina says, her gaze roaming from my green T-shirt to my jeans and sneakers. “You look, uh, different out of uniform.” She shoots a look at Anna I can’t interpret.
“Yup,” I say, unsure if she just insulted me or not. Especially when they giggle on their way out of the shop.
Jenna calls out to me. “Grab a seat anywhere. I’ll get your check and the paperwork I drew up to cover paying your deductible. Have you heard any news from the insurance company on how much they’ll cover?”
“Not yet.”
I glance over at the three small round tables at the front of the shop and head for the one in the center. The chairs are kinda small, white metal with a pink round cushion. I don’t think Jenna had men in mind with these chairs.
As soon as she sits across from me, she gets right down to business, handing me a check for one hundred dollars. Then she hands me a paper that spells out paying in hundred-dollar installments once a month until her debt is paid down for the thousand-dollar deductible. She added five percent interest, which is high, and I said I didn’t need that. She must not make much at this place if she can only afford a hundred dollars a month. If her bakery is failing, she’ll probably leave town for a new job, which would suck. She’s only been here a year. Why did I avoid her for so long? It seems stupid in retrospect. She’s moved past my teenaged blunder, so I can too.
She hands me a pen. “You can make changes if you’d like. I was guessing on the interest rate.”