“Sorry,” I muttered. “I, um, got distracted.”
“Of course you did. Hottie McHotstuff was practically eye-fucking you for five minutes. When are you going to hit that, girl?”
I shook my head. Jayme might be completely confident when it came to ensnaring men—different guys rotated in and out of our apartment on a regular basis—but I was more reserved. Well, to be honest, I was shy. And wary, after being cheated on by my boyfriend last year. I was what Jayme termed a serial monogamist. I didn’t trust easily, so when I finally did start to open up to someone, I committed fully.
Jimmy cheating on me had set me back even further when it came to trust issues.
“You’re crazy for not tapping that,” Jayme declared. “You know Joseph would come home with you if you invited him. Let’s stay until close, and then you can make your move.”
I rolled my eyes. “You know that won’t happen. I wish you wouldn’t tease me about it.”
She held up her hands in a show of contrition. “I’m not teasing. I’m trying to get you some well-deserved action.”
I blew out a sigh. I couldn’t put myself on the line like that, especially when I feared rejection. Jayme seemed sure that my invitation would be accepted, but I wasn’t so certain. I still wasn’t convinced that Joseph was truly interested in me.
She made a little waving motion, shifting the subject. “Okay, let’s start with an easier mark, then. You know Stu is into you. You kissed at that house party last weekend. He’s kind of an entitled douche, but he’s hot. It’s not like you have to marry him or anything.” She smirked on the last, teasing just a little.
My pulse stuttered, but not in the same way Joseph affected me. This was a nervous reaction. The last time I’d been with Stu, he’d provided me with a steady supply of some mystery cocktail that’d been strong enough to burn my throat with every sip. I’d known it was highly alcoholic, but I’d overindulged to counteract my social anxiety. By the end of the night, I’d been rolling my hips while dancing with wild abandon, and Stu had moved in. I’d kissed him in a drunken frenzy in the middle of the party.
It wasn’t like me to behave that way, and I was deeply embarrassed by the memory. Jayme was right. I’d been a while since I’d gotten intimate with a guy, and the alcohol in my system had loosened my inhibitions too much.
“I’m not proud of that,” I said truthfully.
“So, you don’t like him?”
I shrugged. Stu was conventionally attractive, but he didn’t make my heart race and my belly clench.
Jayme gave me a sly smile. “Well, you’d better make up your mind fast, because he’s on his way over here.” She pushed away from the table. “I’m going to get a drink. I’ll be back soon. Maybe. Probably not. Get it, girl.”
“Jayme,” I said sharply. She simply grinned and slipped into the crowd.
“Hey, Ashlyn. You need a drink?” I recognized Stu’s voice behind me.
I closed my eyes for a moment and took a breath before turning to face him. I managed a polite smile and raised my full cup. “I’m good,” I assured him. “But thanks.”
“Next one’s on me.” He flashed a wide, boyish grin. With his dark blond hair and forest green eyes, Stu was cute in a clean-cut, preppy way. He wore a slightly formal blue button-up shirt and boat shoes, exuding casual country-club vibes.
Preppy and entitled wasn’t my usual type, but he was undeniably charming.
“I’m glad I caught you here tonight. I’ve been wanting to ask you something,” he said, still grinning that cocky grin.
“Yeah?” I shifted on my feet, and my fingers twined together in an unconscious nervous tic. If he was about to ask me back to his place, I was going to have to deal with the awkwardness of turning him down. No matter how long it’d been since I’d slept with a guy, I wasn’t interested in casual sex.
“We’re hosting a party at the Fly clubhouse next weekend. I want you to be my date.” His chin tipped back slightly, his posture swelling with pride and a touch of haughtiness.
The Fly was one of the prestigious, exclusive final clubs at Harvard. It was kind of a big deal that Stu was a member. And it was kind of a big deal for him to invite me, especially since I didn’t really run in those circles. My introverted nature had made the vetting process for final clubs far too daunting to consider, and I’d assumed they weren’t going to be part of my Harvard experience.
It would be cool to see the inside of the clubhouse, but Stu wasn’t exactly asking me to be his date. More like he was making an announcement. Even though these parties could be infamously decadent, I wasn’t very impressed with his attitude.
“Oh,” I managed, stalling. Stu’s demeanor rubbed me the wrong way, but I really was tempted to go to the party.
His brows rose, and one corner of his mouth ticked up in a teasing smile. “Oh? Is that a yes?”
Definitely cocky. But there was a touch of uncertainty in his eyes that softened my irritation. He didn’t want to be rejected by me any more than I wanted to be rejected by Joseph. At least Stu had the guts to ask me out, unlike me when it came to making a move on Joseph.
I smiled up at him. “Sure. I’ll be your date.”
Even though I wasn’t interested in him romantically, dressing up and getting an inside look at the Fly clubhouse would be fun. And like Jayme said, I didn’t have to marry him. It was just a date, not a promise for a long-term relationship.
“But only if Jayme can come too,” I added with forced assertiveness. Not only did I need my bestie as an anxiety buffer, but she would be even more thrilled to attend the party than I was.
Stu returned my smile with a triumphant grin, and his gaze left mine to search for Jayme. When he caught sight of her, his eyes flicked up and down her body, appraising. “For sure. There’s always room on the guest list for beautiful ladies.”
I smothered a frown. I didn’t love the idea that Jayme and I might’ve been invited to the event only because the guys wanted to pack the room with women for them to ogle.
Stu’s grin turned sharp enough to make me edge away on instinct. I fought down the budding suspicion that female guests weren’t invited solely to serve as arm candy. We were fresh meat.
This is just how it is, I reminded myself. Most students were desperate to attend these parties. The members could be as selective with the guest list as they wanted. Really, I should be flattered that Stu wanted me to come as his date. And it would be comforting to have Jayme with me. It was nice of Stu to include her so easily. Wasn’t it?
He raised his beer and touched it to my cup, sealing our promised date with a celebratory “cheers.” I realized I hadn’t said anything for several seconds, so I hastily tipped my own drink back in response. He drained half his beer in a few long gulps, but I lowered mine after no more than a sip. I didn’t want to get drunk and lose control again.
Stu’s disconcerting energy was putting me on edge, and it would be far too easy to down my vodka in an attempt to soothe my mounting nervousness. I knew my anxiety level wasn’t rational, and I wished Jayme was at my side. My bestie always grounded me when she sensed I was about to spiral.