There was a set of ten stairs that I always tried jumping and rarely landed. Griff caught me eyeing them, in the mood to tackle something hard. He gave me a little push between my shoulder blades. “Go for it,” he urged, his voice soft but sending a ripple through me.
I circled back to the edge of the park to get a little more speed. My heart raced as I got closer, knowing the odds of falling and getting some nice bruises were higher than landing. I crouched low right before hitting the top stair, pressing my back foot down to lift the front of the skateboard. My feet remained planted on the board as I caught air, soaring over the steps.
When my board hit the ground on a flat surface, I knew I’d made it past all ten steps. A happy sigh left me as I glided forward, swerving in little arcs and shimmying my hips like I always did when I landed a difficult trick.
I looked over my shoulder and found Griff was in the air, riding over the same set of stairs. He zoomed forward as he landed, until we were inches apart, face to face.
I found myself studying his expression through the new lens of his confession. A hot rush flew through my veins at the way his eyes shone back at me, and I tried once again to remember why it didn’t matter. The risk was too high.
Griffin
I was usually good with women; it was easy for me. With Naomi? I was a train wreck.
She broke eye contact and started to skate away but I reached out and grabbed her hand. “Naomi, you didn’t do the calculations right.” It wasn’t smooth, but this was the angle I’d decided to take. Maybe if I spoke her language, she’d pause and listen long enough to hear me.
She stopped and look at our joined hands. “Calculations?”
“Your risk assessment, you didn’t do it right.”
“I didn’t?”
“You aren’t weighing the potential benefit heavily enough.” Her eyes snapped up to mine. “And you definitely aren’t accurately assessing the likelihood of success, of how good we’ll be together. If you’ll let me, I’ll show you how perfect we’ll be.”
Naomi swallowed and slipped her hand out of mine.
“I like to be conservative in my assessments, and those particular points are difficult to measure. What if it doesn’t work out, Griff? If we do anything about these non-sibling-type feelings we have, it can’t be something quick and light. For me, it can’t be one kiss, one hook-up. I need a promise from you that we’ll really try. I’m not going to risk our friendship for an impulsive short-term thing.” Her eyes darted away as the words tumbled from her mouth.
I moved closer, reached a hand out to cup her chin and turned her head back to face me.
“If you want this, Naomi, I’m yours. Just say the word. I don’t think it will be hard being together the way we want, but if it is, I’m not going to give up. Do you really want me the way I want you?”
She tilted her head to the side and eyed me skeptically.
“That depends. How do you want me?”
My hand dropped from her face as my pulse quickened. Did I go all in and tell her exactly how deep these feelings went, or would that scare her off? My instincts told me Naomi didn’t want to hear I was simply attracted to her. That wasn’t even close to enough to give me a chance in her risk-benefit analysis.
Before I could figure out how exactly to articulate my response, she beat me to it.
“Griff.” Her hand now moved to cup my cheek like I’d done to hers a moment ago. “I’m asking because I’ve been in love with you as long as I can remember. Way before it was appropriate. And that doesn’t mean the way I feel for you hasn’t matured as I’ve grown up. It’s only gotten stronger. So if you aren’t ready for that, if me telling you this scares you, let’s just forget any of this conversation ever happened.”
I shut her up by slamming my mouth against hers.
Naomi
Griffin’s lips on mine were better than I ever imagined. And I’d imagined them a lot. He kissed me like he’d been dreaming about it for years too, like he wanted to do it over and over again for the rest of our lives. His hands moved to my hips and he held me like he cherished me and he would cherish me forever. My feet were still on the skateboard, and I didn’t realize he was rolling me backward until my calves hit a bench. Griff turned us and sat down, pulling me over his lap.
When I shifted against the hardness beneath me, he groaned and tightened his grip. His lips and his touches were as hot as they were precious. They made me want to continue with my confessions of love, no matter how embarrassing they were, while also making me want to roll my hips and dry hump right here on the picnic table in the neighborhood skate park. Remembering where we were, I pulled back to catch my breath and get myself under control. Griff looked as dazed as I felt. Our chests rose and fell as if we’d been skateboarding a half pipe for the last ten minutes.
Catching movement out of the corner of my eye, I turned and found Summer standing a few feet away, skateboard in hand, jaw halfway to the ground.
She opened and closed her mouth a few times, pointed a finger at us, jutted out a hip, crossed her arms. Finally, she threw her hands in the air and looked up at the sky before shouting, “This is the best fucking Christmas present ever!”
Griff and I exchanged confused and worried glances and I forced myself to slide off of him to stand on shaky legs.
Summer ran over and hugged me. “When did this start? How long? Tell me everything. Maybe not everything. And maybe wait until my brother is gone since, you know, he’s still my brother.”
Griff chuckled, and as I glanced at him from over Summer’s shoulder, he discreetly adjusted himself. “Guess we don’t need to have another risk analysis discussion about how the family will react or how to share the news.”
Summer turned her bright smile on her brother. “I have a feeling everyone will be just as happy about this as I am.”
I was so filled with joy that I didn’t even recognize my own voice when the words tumbled out of my mouth. “Summer, I’m in love with your brother. You’re really okay with this?”
She nodded with way too much enthusiasm. “And he’s totally in love with you.”
Griff let out a noise that was half-laugh, half-choke. “How do you know?”
“I knew before you did,” she said with a shrug. Then she dropped her skateboard and hopped on, skating away with a little wave. I watched her hit the ramp before turning to Griff.
He stood up slowly and walked toward me with a happy and relaxed smile. One of my favorite Griffin Perry smiles. “She’s right, in case that kiss didn’t make it clear.”
“Right about what?” I wanted to hear the words.
“I love you, Naomi. Not like a brother. I’m totally in love with you.” His hands slid around my hips as he used the same words his sister used. But I appreciated the emphasis. Precision was necessary when it was never a matter of if there was love between us, but the type of love that needed clarification.
“Totally worth the risk,” I told him with a decisive nod.
There were some things that couldn’t be assessed and analyzed by risks and rewards. Sometimes you just had to let all that go and trust your gut, your heart, and the people you loved most.