I couldn’t help but chuckle at that. I was sure there were plenty of athletes out there that had tried and succeeded in paying their doctors to clear them for their sport. Don’t get me wrong, I had thought about it as I sat in my house day after day staring out at the ocean. I wasn’t used to being idle. In fact, I was always on the go. At each location of our races, I went out and played the tourist. Formula One racing had taken me across the globe for the last five years, and I appreciated every moment of it. There weren’t many professions where you could do what you love, travel the world, and get paid millions of dollars while doing it. The only con was it was lonely at times.
Crossing my arms over my chest, I answered his question. “I wouldn’t think of it.”
The pain in my head when the light was bright and my swimming vision may have also been contenders as to why I’d stayed home to rest my brain and why I didn’t try to get back onto the track before I was ready. The only problem was with each passing day, the feeling that had started to bubble up in the hospital had risen higher and higher until it was nearly choking me.
“If you’re not ready, your replacement can drive for you. You’re not going to lose your place on the team because you miss a few races.”
A few? I’d already missed four, and while Colton said he wouldn’t replace me, he was losing money with my replacement. He was an okay driver, but he wasn’t coming in the top four spots, and I knew it was hurting the team in points. If I didn’t get back soon, the team would never be able to make up the points to be one of the top teams at the end of the season.
“I’m ready.” I tightened my arms over my chest. My lips turned down at the thought. “If I have to stay home and look at nothing for a moment longer, I’m going to go crazy.”
“That’s what I thought. I’ve got your plane ticket to Barcelona booked, so pack your bags and get the hell out of town. I’ll warn you that Rylee has insisted we be there. She’s going to mother hen you to death.”
“If it’s the price I have to pay, then I’ll gladly pay it.”
Colton chuckled as he stood and came around his desk to clasp me on the shoulder. “You have no idea how pissed off she was when she found out the team didn’t visit you in the hospital. I thought she was going to skin me alive.”
“Don’t worry about it, and when I see her, I’ll let her know I was fine.” Even though it would have been nice to see a familiar face when I woke up.
Callum
Barcelona
Running the tip of my gloved index finger over the words, Callum Crew, I continued with my ritual. I’d already had my pre-race breakfast sandwich, which consisted of an English muffin, a fried egg, and a thick slice of Canadian bacon, all topped with hot sauce.
Squatting down, I kissed my fingertips and placed them on the ground before standing, placing my helmet over my balaclava, and fastening it underneath my chin.
Colton, who’d been standing off to the side, came over and patted my shoulder and gave me a chin nod. Rylee had already been by to visit while I ate my ‘disgusting breakfast’ as she liked to call it.
It had been too long since I’d felt the racetrack beneath my feet. I couldn’t wait to sit behind the wheel and feel the vibration of my car move through me.
My teammate, Udo Kauppinen, was already in his car. I was happy I didn’t have to see him, and it was finally time for me to see where I’d start on the grid tomorrow. To most, it would seem strange, but in the world of Formula One racing, there was no bigger competition than your teammate. So far, Udo had the fastest laps of the day while I was gone, but I paid no mind to his times, knowing I would beat him today.
Luckily, he was already out with the crew while I was getting ready, so I didn’t have to see his smug face. We’d both been at a sponsorship dinner last night. While I’d been gone, Udo had befriended my replacement driver, Eduardo Revere, and they’d snickered to themselves all night as they eyed me from the other end of the table.
As if I gave one shit about them. It was a running joke that I was the only racer who didn’t have a friend amongst the teams. In the beginning, when I didn’t know any better, I had befriended one of my fellow racers. It was all good until I placed ahead of him in a race. By my fifth win over him, Ricardo wouldn’t speak to me. He’d started playing pranks at every destination, and the further they progressed, the angrier I got until one day I blew up and let him get in my head. He was no longer on our team, but since then, I’d vowed to keep to myself and not let anyone affect my driving ever again.
Climbing inside my car, I breathed in the smell of fuel and rubber as Hank attached my steering wheel. I sat back while I was buckled into my six-point harness. Everything about me instantly calmed, from my breathing to the blood flowing through my veins, as I gripped the wheel and felt the leather of my gloves stretch over my fingers.
It was good to be home.
“Crew, do you read?” Kaspar asked through the headset.
“Loud and clear.” I grinned from behind my visor.
“You’ve got about five minutes until Q one starts,” I heard through my ear.
“Roger that.”
With my eyes closed, I waited until it was time to drive. I listened to the world around me and the crew as they did their last-minute touches to the car. Usually, I was out with the crew, but not today. I wanted to be seated in my car and getting a feel for her again.
“Thirty seconds until engine start-up.”
My fingers curled around the wheel as I waited for the engine to start. The roar filled my entire body and exhilarated me, and I couldn’t stop the smile that spread across my face. This was where I was meant to be. If I didn’t have racing, I didn’t know what I’d do with my life.
“Ten seconds,” Kaspar informed me.
And then I was off. I kept to the right and fought my way through the pack of cars.
“You’re making great time, Callum. Keep up the good work.”
I knew I was. I could feel it in my bones. Today was my fastest time. Each time I was out on the track, I tried to do better than ever before.
Five cars ahead of me, the lead car suddenly jerked to the side and hit the wall. Instantly, heavy gray smoke billowed out of the car.
I couldn’t keep my eyes off the yellow car or the driver as I passed by.
Once they were no longer in my vision, everything turned into some sort of tunnel vision. I shook my head as the voice in my ear sounded garbled, and my heart rate picked up. A sheen of sweat coated my body as I heated internally. My mouth became dry, and I tried to lick my lips to help alleviate even a fraction of the dryness. When that didn’t work, I hit the drink button on my steering wheel. I knew I was in trouble when I could barely do that one simple function.
“Crew, Crew, can you hear me?”
I could, but I couldn’t answer. I could barely breathe, and with each passing second, I thought my heart was going to explode in my chest.
“Callum, talk to me, buddy. It’s all clear. You can speed back up now.” Kaspar’s voice was the only thing keeping me from slipping away entirely.
“I can’t breathe,” I finally grunted out. The amount of effort it took for me to get those three words out had sweat pouring down my face.