Home > No Longer Lost(3)

No Longer Lost(3)
Author: Angel Payne

I wanted to. Dear God, how I wanted to.

And was a split second from caving…

But stepped back instead.

Traitor brain! Why? My heart and body wanted to jump on him like a monkey, wrapping my arms and legs around him and never letting go. What the hell was this stepping back bullshit?

“I… We…”

“What?” His gaze turned the shade of a haunted forest, the green nearly turned to black. Oh holy crap, did thick and needy lust look fantastic on him. “What is it?”

Hard gulp. Swimming senses. “This—This isn’t the place,” I blurted with trumped-up conviction. “We’re way too fucked up for a quick make-out session in someone’s laundry closet, and we both know it, Mac.”

The forest gained new shadows. The beautiful planes of his rugged face turned the texture of dark concrete—except for the twitch of a smirk at one corner of his firm lips.

“Firstly, I had no intention of being quick.”

He closed the step I’d just taken, actually thinking I could create a buffer between us. We were only inches apart again.

“Secondly, if this is your idea of a closet, I’d better ask for a raise.”

He lifted his hand to the back of my neck, cradling my head in his big palm.

“And…third?” I husked, though the effort was a challenge. Damn, how he affected me. Aroused me. Seared every inch of my bloodstream with the knowledge of his nearness…and my inevitable reaction to it.

“Well.” He wet his lips, making me do the same. “Third is…” He held me captive the entire time he spoke, and his words prodded incessantly at my wounded heart. “You’re right.”

I blinked. “I…am? About what?”

“We’re pretty fucked up right now,” he finally murmured. “But at least we both agree, and at least we’re both still using the word us.”

And now I really and truly couldn’t speak. So I just stared up at him, not even beginning to process everything he’d just said. A raise? Like we’d be buying a home together in the future? And us? Not quick about it? “It” what? My heart throbbed. My body tingled. And worst of all, my head spun like it usually did when this infuriating and sexy bastard was near me.

“Mac…”

“Hmmm?”

His mouth was inches from mine. I fixated on the deep dip in the upper part and how the edges curled up a little. I wanted to trace all those enticing hills and angles. Memorize them. But that would have to wait—because right now, all I wanted to do was kiss him.

Deeply.

Thoroughly.

Not stopping until our tongues were eagerly meshing, our lips were passionately pressing, and our breaths were nearly matching. Hot for hot. Fire for fire. Lust for lust. Nothing had changed. No; it was better. More consuming than I remembered. More primal. More desperate.

More…of everything…

“Taylor. Goddamn.” He rushed it out between feverish pants, but only until I grabbed his hair and hauled him down for a crashing collision. I was a woman possessed, starving for the spice-and-wind taste of him. Thrumming for the steel-and-sin feel of him. Aching for the complete and total dominance of him. “Can…can we go somewhere?” he finally snarled against my lips. “Will you come back to my place?”

I held back a conflicted mewl. Oh, God. The heat of his body and the hopeful desire in his eyes were so damn hard to resist…and nearly impossible to turn down.

“No. I mean, yes,” I stammered. “No. Wait. I mean, not right now. I mean, we just—I just—got here.” I closed my eyes, sealing myself from his gorgeousness so I could wrestle together the might to move away. It was the only way I’d think clearly. “I promised Talia I’d help her with the party. And I haven’t seen the babies yet. And, well. Yeah, no. Not today. But I would like to.” Oh God, would I really like to. “To see you, I mean. If you still want to. To see me, I mean.”

“Oh, Sassy.” He chuckled, his arrogance simultaneously enraging me and stoking my lust. Well, more than it was. Maybe a little more than more. Whatever the hell that level was. “Are you stoned?”

“Fine.” My retort was the same mix of arousal and aggravation. “Fuck off, Clown.” I disengaged fully, whirling to step away, but he grabbed my hand before I could get too far.

“Eloquent as always.” His wink actually did make me feel lit up—not that I was going to let him know that. “Come here. Come here.” He gave in, holding his arms out and curling the tips of his fingers in. I took one step closer, making him meet me halfway. The gesture was necessary for me to see. He did it without hesitation, wrapping me all the way into his embrace, and at once I buried my face in his strong chest. And breathed in his crisp, masculine smell. And let myself sink into the knowledge of his safe, sure hold.

Holy shit, I’d missed him. More than I’d been letting myself admit.

We stood there for a few minutes, simply savoring the contact of each other again, before he finally leaned back, letting me see the taut look on his face.

“What?” I prodded.

“You need to take better care of yourself.”

I rolled my eyes. “Oh, for—”

“Please. Eat something that’s actually nutritious today.”

“Is that an order, Clown?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Would you listen if it were? You can’t keep doing this to yourself. Eat something other than cereal with a cartoon character on the fucking box. Protein would be a good start.” He folded his arms. “I’m going to get Margaux on my side, and then you’ll be sorry.”

I openly laughed. “Good luck with that, pal. The girl is jealous of this.” I waved my hand up and down the length of my vanishing body, attempting to mask a twinge of my own concern. I knew I’d finally see him at one of these Stone get-togethers, just as I knew he’d give me shit about “nutrition.” But honestly, eating hadn’t been very appealing the past few weeks, and I had lost a few pounds—pounds that probably should’ve stayed right where they were. It would all come back again in no time; I just needed to put some effort into the game.

Similar to the effort Mac was giving me now, as he continued to glare down his strong nose at me. Apparently the man didn’t feel like joking when my well-being was at stake.

“Ease up, chief.” I pushed at the muscled wall of his chest. “It’s fine. I just haven’t been all that hungry. You know very well that I normally have a hearty appetite. Things have been a little stressful lately.”

“Your mom?” His words conveyed sincere concern.

“Nah. I haven’t heard a word from her in two weeks. Not since the night…well, when…”

I drifted off on purpose, realizing the totally awkward vibe I was projecting but refusing to bring up the letter he’d left on my car. The letter. That letter. I couldn’t think of the damn thing without getting angry all over again, and this time was no different.

“Since the night we broke up?” He finished my thought—which pulled the trip wire on my fury.

“Broke up? Mac, this isn’t high school. We weren’t going steady. I wasn’t wearing your letterman’s sweater. Shit. We were fucking. Dating, maybe? Is that what people say in this era? I don’t know. But then you kind of threw that out the window, didn’t you? With the Dear John letter you so gallantly left on Missy? So brave of you to do that, by the way. Thanks for at least tucking it under the wiper so I’d be absolutely sure to get it. Way to face the music in person.”

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