Home > Full Throttled (Furiously Fast #1)(9)

Full Throttled (Furiously Fast #1)(9)
Author: Stephanie Nichole

Zoey nods and I turn to leave. “Drake?” I turn around and see her fidgeting with her hands. “Thank you.”

“Always,” I tell her. I want to remind her that I’ll always save her if she’ll let me and maybe I would have, but it’s not just about me. I have Aubree to consider now and Zoey isn’t dependable. My heart aches for both of these girls; Aubree and Zoey, but I know that only one can matter.

 

 

Seven

Zoey

 

When the door shuts behind Drake, I take a deep breath. I didn’t realize that I had barely been breathing. Being around Drake again stirred something inside me. It’s probably just nostalgia, but it feels like more. It’s overwhelming along with everything else. Leaving Gregg and the only life I had known for the past six years, and now to learn about my father… is hard. I’m still not sure why I had the reaction that I did, but I’m thankful Drake was there. He was always the best at calming me. He’s not like most guys who run away from an emotional, crying girl. He just accepts and comforts her.

The knock on the door nearly makes me jump out of my skin. I forgot Drake sent Wilder to get my things. I open the door and find the boy standing there looking uncertain. “I only found this one.”

I nod. “Yeah, that’s it. Thank you.”

“No problem. Listen, I’m sorry for not letting you in earlier, but I’m new and I didn’t know that Zayde had a sister.”

I wave my hand in a dismissive gesture. “It’s not a problem, really.”

Wilder nods. “Well, if you need anything I’m just down the hall. It’ll be quiet until the guys get back.” I nod my head and he turns to leave. “Oh, Zoey, I’m sorry about your dad.”

My heart clenches. “Thank you.”

Wilder nods his head. “Good night.”

“Good night,” I tell him, as he heads back down the hallway. I shut the door and lock it. Wilder seems harmless, but I’ve learned to not be the naïve girl I once was. Things are rarely what they seem. I sigh and cross the room and stand next to the bed. I’m not surprised to see the green plaid bedding. It was always Drake’s favorite color. The room is neat and tidy; just how I remember his room being at his parent’s house. The chest of drawers and desk is clear of clutter. I reach over and turn on the lamp on the bedside table. His discarded iPod is lying on the nightstand. The charger is wrapped up and lying beside it. I decide to go ahead and plug it in.

I could use a shower, but I don’t have any soap or shampoo. I step out of the room and look around, but I don’t see anyone. I decide to go and take a peak in the bathroom. Maybe, someone has left some here. I knock on the door and open it just a tad. It’s empty. I turn on the light and pull the shower curtain back. There is a slew of shampoos, conditioners, and soaps. I sigh in relief and rush back to Drake’s room and grab a t-shirt and leggings from my bag and rush back to the bathroom.

I lock the door and start the shower, thankful when the water turns hot. There’s a tube of discarded toothpaste lying on the bathroom counter. Grabbing the tube, I squirt some onto my finger and do the best to brush my teeth, at this point anything is better than nothing. I climb into the steaming, hot shower and allow the water to work the stiffness from being in the car out of my muscles. The last few days hit me like a tidal wave and I allow myself this time to fully let my decision and the events of the past few days sink in. It doesn’t take as long as I would assume. I had basically already come to terms with the fact of leaving Gregg and what little life we had built behind. I think subconsciously I always knew I’d have to leave. I knew the end for us was inevitable even if I didn’t want to admit it to myself until the moment I walked and saw my suspicions confirmed.

I don’t think leaving my life behind is what has caused me to feel so heavy inside my body. It’s walking back into my past. It’s finding out that my father is gone. My room being destroyed. Drake looking the same yet, so different at the same time. I don’t think I expected the world here to change in my absence which was foolish.

Some little girl version that lives inside of myself had always hoped to mend the relationship with my father. I had hoped that one day we could have an actual discussion and he would see I wasn’t like my mother, the woman he loved to compare me too. I knew he was hurting and lashing out at me was his way of coping. It was wrong, but people that are hurt often handle things in a wrong manner. I had this childish dream that we would apologize and he’d hug me. Now, that will never happen and I feel like something has been yanked from my body, from my grasp, something that I deserved to have, but never will.

Seeing my room so demolished yanked at my heart with razor sharp claws. I know that Zayde did it. There isn’t a question in my mind. I don’t know what even brought him to that decision, but I know him well enough to know that his anger often overpowers all his sense. He’s always been a tad hot headed, okay a lot hot headed. I had hoped it had simmered down, but seeing the state of my room I’m certain it hasn’t. I can’t say that I blame him, though. We had made a pact when we were much younger, after our mother left, to never abandon one another. I broke that pact. I hurt him and his way of dealing is to lash out in anger. I don’t blame him, I blame myself. It’s my fault and I hate that I hurt him. Until Drake, he was my only protector, friend and person to rely on.

Drake, I think with a sigh. Drake was so much in such a short time in my life. He walked into my life and soul with his good boy, southern charm and dimpled smile. He imprinted himself inside of me without either of us knowing. It wasn’t until I had to truly let him go that I realized how much I missed him and just how important he had become in my life. Drake is different now. Life has changed him. He looks different with all the tattoos and I won’t deny that they look damn good on him. My mouth may have watered a little and my heart definitely took notice but it’s the guarded look in his eye that makes me want to know what happened to him after I left. The last thing I expected was to come back and find him as an actual member of the Sons of Sin. I thought he might race because of his family, but I didn’t really expect to see him so tied up in the club.

When he held me, it felt so familiar, that it only made me cry. The ache I had always felt for him was more intense than I could have expected and it left with this gaping hole to fill. I fear though that he’s the only one that can fill it. I have my doubts about him ever trusting me though. I don’t even know where to begin in order to fix the mess I left behind when I ran away.

The water starts to cool so I step out of the shower and slip the clothes on before pulling my damp hair back into a messy bun. I make my way back to Drake’s room. Tomorrow I’ll have to find a job and call the college to ask if there is any way I can finish my degree online. Hopefully, it’s not too late in the semester for that. I also need to call my jobs back in Mississippi to let them know I won’t be there.

My mind is sleepy and restless, but my eyes start to feel heavy. I lie back on Drake’s bed and his familiar scent, even as faint as it is, comforts me. I roll over while going through my plans for tomorrow. As I drift off, I swear I hear Drake’s voice outside of the door and even a faint tap, but I’m too tired to really comprehend as I let sleep take me.

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