“You’re sensitive,” he said, making it sound like the sweetest praise.
Gathering her wetness, he rubbed a circle around the bundle of nerves. The pleasure that shot through her body arched her hips. She’d never touched herself like this, couldn’t make herself do it, not even in the darkness of her room alone in her bed, not when she’d be forced to come out of hiding and face herself. Hiding was safer, easier. There was no hiding from the raw sensation that strangled her insides as he dipped a finger inside and pushed the pad of his thumb on her clit.
She gripped his shoulders, leaning back to give him better access. “Oh, my God.”
“Feel it,” he said against her neck. “I’m going to make it good for you.”
Reason dissipated as her mind splintered into a thousand shooting stars. Only need remained, locking her in the physical moment.
Boldness she’d never feel in daylight made her say, “Make me come.”
He kissed her neck, sucking her skin hard enough to leave a hickey. “You can count on that.”
It only took one more flick of his thumb before the orgasm crashed through her. It was liberating and scary, exactly how she’d imagined it would be with him. It left her feeling both vulnerable and strong, a beautiful duality of completion.
He gave her control, letting her ride his fingers until she collapsed against his chest, and then he took it back with a fist in her hair and his lips on hers.
The kiss was different. It didn’t feel like giving any longer. This was taking. She could barely keep up, her jaw hurting from the strain and her lungs begging for air.
Desperate for a breath, she pushed on his chest. He broke the kiss to lift her to her feet with his hands around her middle. She looked down in confusion as he gripped her shorts and pulled them down her thighs.
“Wait,” she said, grabbing his hands.
He stilled. “I just want to feel you. Nothing you don’t want is going to happen.”
His voice was less slurry, as if desire had cleared his head. She trusted him. She’d never forgotten what he’d said to Iwig, but then Erwan’s words slammed into her mind, and her lust shriveled in shame.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“You’re with someone.”
He chuckled. “Yeah. I’m with you.”
“I mean another woman.”
His lush lips tilted. “Are you the jealous type?”
She wasn’t going to admit to something she had no right feeling. “Are you?”
“I don’t share,” he said with a dark glint in his eyes, “so you have nothing to worry about.”
“But—”
“Take off your shorts.”
The command had been spoken with enough dominance to make it easy for her to obey. Just this once. She wanted to own this secret.
When she’d shimmied out of her shorts and underwear, he took her hands. “Now come back here.”
He pulled her down to straddle him again. Her back arched when her naked folds touched his jean-clad thigh. “Ah, Joss.”
“Feel good?” he murmured, pressing a kiss against the shell of her ear.
“God, yes.”
Dragging her up over his groin with his hands under her arms, he said in a husky voice, “Ride my cock.”
The hard rod between his legs parted her folds, the rough edge of the zipper seam adding friction as she glided her body over his length. It felt better than anything, even more so when he flicked down the other cup of her bra and palmed her breasts.
Another orgasm started to build. She angled her body, trying to hit the right spot, but then his touch disappeared and she felt him fumbling with the button of his jeans.
“What are you doing?” she asked in a panicked whisper.
“Let me feel you,” he said. “Skin on skin.”
This was dangerous, her mind screamed, but her body was past caring. In this, her mind had never stood a chance. She leaned back, giving him space to pull down the zipper. He freed his cock, heavy and thick, so hard with desire. For her.
He dragged her closer. “Do it again, just like before.”
Cradling her face, he stared into her eyes as if he might find answers to riddles as she slid back up his thighs. The minute their naked skins touched, her eyes drifted closed. Desire was sharp, a gemstone with rough, shining edges cutting through her defenses. His skin felt like velvet against hers, hot and hard. Her arousal made her slick, aiding her movement when she dragged her folds over his length to the head of his cock.
He hissed when her clit touched the crest. She opened her eyes to look at him. His features were distorted, his face pulled into a grimace, but with something different than pain.
“Put me inside,” he said.
Her lips parted.
“Only the tip,” he coaxed. “Just give me a taste of how tight you are.”
The thought made her burn. There was no way she couldn’t obey. There was no way she could walk away without feeling just the tip of what could never be. Or maybe what could, her hopeful heart whispered.
“Wait,” he said when she lifted herself.
He spread out his coat on either side of him so her knees had someplace soft to land. Stradling him on her knees, she folded her fingers around his cock.
He let out a groan. “You’re going to make me shoot fast.”
Nervous with uncertainty, she fumbled a little. As if sensing her need for him to take control, he stilled her hands and placed them on his shoulders. His eyes rested reassuringly on hers, burning with heat but offering a smile. She held onto the anchors he offered as he gripped the base of his cock in one hand and her hip in the other. He brushed the crest from the bottom of her slit to the top, ending on her clit.
“Christ,” he said, his shoulders going rigid under her palms.
She shivered with need, but when he positioned the head at her entrance, she turned crazy with want. He parted her carefully, pushing the head gently inside.
Fire consumed her from the inside out. A primal need demanded one thing only, that she consummated this.
“Deeper,” she said, tightening her fingers on his shoulders.
“You sure about that?” he asked against her lips.
It was too late to back out. She couldn’t return to being nothing, to exist unnoticed. She wanted to own this piece of him. Tomorrow didn’t matter. Tomorrow, she’d go back to living her life through others, a spectator looking through a window, but tonight she was here. Tonight, he saw her. Tonight, she could have this stolen moment.
“Yes,” she said, the word a sigh.
He crushed their mouths together, kissing her hard as he angled his hips and slipped another inch inside. She gasped into his mouth. The stretch burned. The insatiable desire wasn’t enough to eliminate the discomfort, but somehow it seemed fitting. What was happening between them was too big for only sweet pleasure. Without the duality added by the pain, the sweetness couldn’t exist. The moment needed the razor-edged side of the spectrum to be the complex, intense, and perfectly beautiful experience it was.
With the strain that his control was taking etched on his face, he clasped his hands around her middle and guided her down over his length. A path of fire burned up inside her. She whimpered as he kissed her and swallowed her sounds. He didn’t stop, didn’t give her a reprieve until he was buried so deep their groins pressed together.